Peering into the Future (Upcoming PT opportunities)

Our rookie season is going by faster than a Moleman clapper – as are the chances to build out those precious, precious experience points. With only a few days to respond to some of the PT challenges, it sure would help to know what’s coming.

Fortunately for you, during a recent trip through Ft. Collins, I was able to obtain a slightly used Ouija board. A couple two-fours later and the Mammoth crew had knocked out some serious spiritually assisted intel.

Feel free to get started now...

S30 PT #8 – Field of Memes. Tell the story of your player using only memes. 3 capped TPE for doing the thing. 0.5 uncapped TPE per successfully used meme (up to 3 uncapped).

S30 PT #9 – Divisive Characters. Which S31 draft year rookie is the most divisive in the SMJHL? Take a side and explain why everyone else are just “haterz.” 3 capped TPE for completion + up to 2 uncapped TPE for creativity – Lose 1 TPE for every reference to Nerokov. (note: we will award negative TPE).

S30 PT #10 – Haiku You Could Do It. Write a haiku or limerick describing your player. Be creative, don’t just quote your stat sheet. Remember, haikus aren’t the ones that rhyme, they’re the ones that use iambic pentameter. 6 capped TPE

S30 PT #11 – Beat the Heat. You’ve been rookies for .75 season. (that’s 3/4ths if any updaters are reading) You’ve seen some things, you’ve done some things. Some of you have way too much time on your hands. Give us 500 words on an outing with your teammates that involved a close call with the authorities and how you got away. Totally implicate one of your “send downs” since they should know better. 2 capped TPE.

S30 PT #12 – European Vacation. The SMJHL and SHL aren’t the only games in town. Your home country is watching, too, and the winter Olympics are just around the corner. Show off your nationalistic flair to impress your nation’s hockey officials. Use 400 words or 2 renders to illustrate your comprehensive grasp of what makes your country uniquely great. Canadian nationals get 3 capped TPE, US nationals get 3.88 capped TPE, European Union nationals get 4.34 capped TPE.

S30 PT #13 – It's not Gay in a Threeway. Pick one rival and one teammate to engage in an amorous adventures. Mention one thing you've worked on this season to help you reach your goals. Make sure to include a quote from your mentor on your performance. 69 uncapped TPE – please make sure to cap your TPE during the exercise.

S30 PT #14 – Use Your Allusion. The S31 draft is nigh. Make a final impression on SHL GMs by describing what you have to offer their teams. But you don’t want to put them off you, so make sure to do so in a reflective, non-braggart way. Also don’t use clichés. 4 TPE for doing the thing, +0.5 TPE for each use of allegory or innuendo (capped at 6 TPE total).

S30 PT #15 – Burning Bridges. The playoffs have just finished and most of you can only look on in envy at the 4 Star Cup winners taking turns doing inappropriate things with the cup. Now that you are no longer rookies and done playing in the SMJHL, go ahead and tell your Manager how you really feel about their line choices. There is no word count limit, go ahead and really let them have it. It’s not like you’re ever going to play for them again! 0 TPE, doing the thing is payment in and of itself.

S30 PT #16 – Going Through the Motions. You’ve reached the end of the season and you’ve realized that you are hopelessly addicted to, and will likely degrade yourself in just about any way, for just one more score of TPE. Score 0.5 TPE for posting the “Y’all got any more of that TPE” meme with your player’s head photoshopped/gimped on. 0.5 TPE you desperate motherfucker.

Remember – only S30 SMJHL Rookies are eligible for this PT and you can claim your TPE when a post is made in the global claim thread.

At least, I think that’s what the Ouija board said. We were all pretty hammered.