Written Task: Describe how your team is going to win the cup this season, because obviously they are. Include at least one dad joke.

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for S74 because this season, the Calgary Dragons are breathing fire and aiming for glory! First off, our strategy is to tighten up the defense, creating a fortress around our goalie so impenetrable that even a dad joke couldn't sneak through! Speaking of which, why did the hockey player go to jail? Because he was caught "high-sticking" around! But seriously, our offense is set to soar like a puck in overtime. With Tom Pedersen leading the charge on the left wing, we're lining up shots so precise, they're asking to be framed in the net. Furthermore, our power plays are smoother than Zamboni ice. We're dishing out passes crisper than a freshly baked batch of hockey-puck cookies (If you eat those, käka puck as they say in Sweden, you’ll lose your teeth as a true hockey player). Lastly, our team spirit? Stronger than a hockey mom's enthusiasm at a 6 AM practice! We've brewed a team spirit that's tighter than a flying dove’s asshole, uniting us in pursuit of the Cup. So, grab your jerseys and your sense of humor. We are skating towards victory, armed with boom-bastic plays, killer dad jokes, and enough enthusiasm to melt the ice! Go Dragons.

Words: 206