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*Scrufdaddy* · 07-25-2021, 06:16 PM

Everyone in the McScruff family is upset that they have to travel to Winnipeg for the family reunion, but it was Slip's turn to host. They are all professional surfers and elite beach volleyball players. Lots of people who like the heat and make it into the Olympics on a regular basis. Of course, I've never mentioned this because they may not exist come time for the next PT.

Safe to say, they look down on Slip who is just a lowly hockey player only making single digit millions of dollars. His mom is the most upset because her nieces and nephews take home gold medals regularly and Slip only has 3 IIHF golds to his name. Her parents and siblings never let her forget, especially during the Olympic years when Slip is the only kid around and the disappointment is obvious. He's just waiting for them to allow hockey players back to the Olympics so he can get passed this and enjoy some nice Fast and the Furious with his family.

TomHanks · 07-25-2021, 06:44 PM

ISFL Affiliate

raymond3000 · 07-25-2021, 06:51 PM

Family reunions are quite the uncommon event for the Kvalheim family. With Andreas spending most of the year in Texas, and with his siblings spread out to other parts of the world, it's hard for the entire family to get together in their hometown of Trondheim, Norway. Fortunately, this season SHL decided to give its players a pre post-season break which allowed Andreas to make the long trek back home. The reunion was quite the low key event, with no crazy mishaps or surprising revelations. It was just a bunch of family members enjoying their time together and catching up on each other's lives. Andreas was the subject of some good natured ribbing after his disappointing regular season with more than a few family members commenting on his rapidly advancing age. However, overall it was a relaxing and refreshing experience for Andreas, giving him a much needed break to recharge and get focused on defending the Challenge Cup with the Renegades.

*fishy* · 07-25-2021, 06:56 PM

Aron Hernadivic, left winger and sometimes right winger, and even the odd faceoff taker, of the simulation hockey leagues Buffalo stampede, a member of the Great Lakes, aka northeast division of the eastern conference, hates his family reunions. hailing from the czech republic, many of aron hernadivic's family members dress like typical europens, adidas tracksuits, some sneakers, and some shitty haircuts. not only that, but aron has to deal with shitty beers and drunk family members, a brutal combo. the boomers of the family talk only about how buffalo has too much cap tied up in its core-four of forwards; hernadivic, luffy, kholin, and hippo. they also only constantly talk about how the young players on buffalo, such as roach, harrington, seppalla, and new acquisition kanoff, are too finesse-driven and aren't fit for playoff hockey. they state that buffalo will never win a cup with these finesse-players and should trade them for grinders and fighters. this understandably drags on hernadivic during the family reunions.

Asked Madden · 07-25-2021, 06:56 PM

The hundertwasser family reunion goes as usual the whole group gets round a comically small table. Papa Hundertwasser brings out the putinov vodka and slams it down in the middle of the table. Vodkaaaaaa?!!! Mama Hundertwasser slams the first shot straight into her eye. Brother Hundertwasser downs a 70 CL of his putinov. Sister Hundertwasser sips on a crisp cold rose. Friedensreich has mixed his 70cl of putinov with a healthy dosage of jack3d and is absolutely amped to the eyeballs.

After this they play danger darts. Using slightly blunted lead darts they huckle these projectiles at each other. First one to scream loses. If no one does its first blood.

The final part of family reunion. 6 hours playing hockey on the partially frozen lake. If you fall in you do shots. It always ends in fighting. Papa Hundertwasser usually knocks fuck out of everyone before they all go inside for more jack3d

bjkman · 07-25-2021, 06:58 PM

PBE Affiliate

fever95 · 07-25-2021, 07:10 PM

PBE Affiliation

jjlangabeer · 07-25-2021, 07:20 PM

It's always nice to use the little bit of time between the regular season and the post season. The best part was this season we were lucky enough to secure a buy weekend. This gave us an extra couple days which coach gave us time off to go unwind. I was sure to jump on this situation and head home for the first time since I came over to Carolina as they were having the annual Raymond Ruckus.

The plane landed in Sweden and I was greeted at the airport by my dad. It was nice to have the short 20 minute ride home to catch up with him, talk about the family life and of course some about the playoffs.

The best though was getting to the party, everyone was there and of course the drinks were flowing. I did indulge in some but not as much as I usually do. Of course my side came out a winner in the beer Olympics, hopefully a precursor of what's to come. The night capped off with us all sitting around the campfire, sharing stories. It was the perfect way to get ready for the grind ahead of us.

LB3737 · 07-25-2021, 07:30 PM

The Duffy family re-union is nearly always a good time for everyone in the family. Taking place in the middle of the summer, it involves the whole extended family third cousins twice removed and all. But since beginning his journey into professional simulation hockey stardom, Shane Duffy Jr. has seldom been able to attend the event, so when he turns up to this years one it is to the entire extended familys delight. However, Shane is nervous turning up to this family reunion as he hasn't talked to most of them about his hockey career, and these nervous feelings were not unfounded as this reunion proved to be a stressful one for him. As soon as he turned up he was bombarded with questions from all of his different relations, "Why are you so sucky at hockey?" "What is Quebec like?" "Why won't you pay for a family vacation?". As soon as Duffy heard all of these queries he realised why he never showed, and immediately went home.

**bbjygm** · 07-25-2021, 07:35 PM

McShotty McFamily reunions can get a little crazy. Now that Slap is a professional hockey player, he's the target of many boasts and criticisms. All the attention has changed his role to "life of the party," which can be a lot of pressure for him. Like a recent lottery winner, everyone and their uncle comes to him with their financial troubles. He's fed up with it, so he decided to make a few promises and mail them money, but only in pennies and one dollar at a time. He gets creative with packaging, encasing the pennies in concrete, spelling choice words with them in a block of clear resin, casting the pennies into a model of a fist flipping the bird, you name it. They don't bother him as much about it, but those penny escapades sure make good stories for future reunions. Slap had so much fun with it that he decided to do the same with all future payments of training and equipment. Have fun!

grok · 07-25-2021, 07:42 PM

family reunions do not happen in the centerman family. each centerman has a terrestrial family, yes. but the family relationships between a centerman and their birth family are not enduring. there is a degree of care involved in raising a centerman, but when the centerman leaves his home, he never returns. the life of a centerman is simply to play until he or she can play no longer, then return to the void until a new centerman is required.

that said, centerman iv does spend at least one day a year meditating on the teachings of centermen of past, reading their collected works and focusing on what it truly means to be a centerman--stone hands and a desire for violent boredom. this is a special day for centerman, and is one he does not spend on the ice or with his team. when the day is done, he sleeps 48 straight hours in preparation for the coming year's work.

*jeffie43* · 07-25-2021, 07:49 PM

For famed SHL player Jack Kanoff, he is used to having hectic family reunions. With siblings Jackgoff and Jackanoff, the three often find themselves getting mixed up as relatives call them during the reunion. Also not knowing for having the most mature of siblings, Jack Kanoff is always sure to see their reunions go to shit sooner or later. Here is how they usually go:

The family finally sits together at the table, getting ready to feast on the delicious meals that they're used to their mom putting together. However, one major mishap that is often seen is the fact that Ms. Kanoff really enjoys using vegetables in her meals, to the dismay of her 3 children. From here on in, the reunion gets messy due to one of Jack's siblings usually throwing a fit and Jack requesting that he leave from the table. Everything from there is an absolute mess, but it is the norm for the Kanoff family.

Nour is pretty hot ngl

***Acsolap*** · 07-25-2021, 07:51 PM

Rex Kirkby of the Philadelphia Forge in the simulation hockey League is very fortunate to have all of his family left including both of his sons who played in other leagues such as the international simulation football league and the pro baseball experience. Neither had careers as lengthy as Rex's but Thor played for a decent number of seasons for the Colorado yeti and the New York silverbacks in the international simulation football league and even won safety of the year and probabaly should have won defensive player of the year but was robbed. Reunions are fun and because of their English heritage the whole Kirkby family likes to drink and eat large roasts at the local pub. Sometimes things can get rowdy and a little bit of play fighting has broken out on occasion but usually it is nothing too serious. As Rex's career is winding down and it won't be long before he retires he is looking forward to being able to spend more time with his loved ones.

Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs.
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*Buster* · 07-25-2021, 08:00 PM

Family reunions aren't typically great for Oliver Cleary. Everyone in his family is highly successful. They are lawyers, doctors, politicians. Oliver Cleary on the other hand is a hockey player and not a great one at that. The pandemic was great for Cleary because he was able to ignore family at every opportunity which allowed him to ignore the constant questions of when he's going to get a real job. Now that we are moving out of the pandemic, Oliver Cleary has finally had to face them. From the moment he arrived at his parent's place in Toronto while in town to face the North Stars, the questions started. “Oliver you aren't even the best defender on the Platoon, why don't you become a doctor?” “Oh Oliver, you're getting older and no one is going to hire you. You have no skills!” Needless to say, Oliver Cleary told them pretty quickly that he had to get to practice.

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Graydonsanatomy · 07-25-2021, 08:03 PM

Given the fact Eric had left his hometown of Estonia he always made sure to make it back every year for the family reunions. The latest left him with a bitter taste in his mouth as he lost his grandfather, who had always been there for him as a young child growing up. Despite him passing the reunion is always a celebration of those that have been lost and for the future of those still here. Eric’s accomplishments in his sophomore season with the Raptors were celebrated throughout the family. Given his surprise draft status going with the last pick in the 1st round, he was able to have the grandest reunion the family had ever seen! Aspirations have only exceeded in his second season as his team oriented behavior has translated to the ice, leading the entire team in short handed ATOI. Once his skills can catch up to his raw size those money checks should be even bigger, then maybe he can rent out an entire island for the reunion

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