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S74 PT#0: Your Dad
Offline JKortesi81
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#106
12-01-2023, 05:02 PM

ISFL PT

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Offline Bruins10
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#107
12-01-2023, 05:13 PM

I am pretty confident that this year is our year. I mean, we did make it to the Eastern Conference finals last season and were just unlucky against Philly and their team. But, the key this year to winning will be doing it as a team. Doing it as a pack, I mean, that is why we are called the Wolfpack right? (What a horrible dad joke I know)
But all jokes aside, I think we are still a tough team to play against. We have lost some pieces over the last couple of years, but the youth is coming up and will take in the place of the older guys that decided to leave. We still have Ivan Lacksamus, who will continue to dominate the league and continue to be the top point getter in New England. Just with him, and the solid other pieces around him, there is no way we are not still at the top of the league at the end of the season.

And then once the playoffs start, it is all the luck of the draw, or the luck of the sim as they say. Would be much more predictable if we still used STHS, but we dont.

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Offline RAmenAmen
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#108
12-01-2023, 05:25 PM

"Ice is slippery, watch out!" -Justin Time to an opposing forward after taking them out at the ankles with a poke check.

The Edmonton Blizzard are the reigning cup champions, and all eyes are on them as they look to repeat the feat in S74. With all but two players returning, the roster looks to take the same path to the cup that they did in S73, by loading up on offense and relying on McBride finalist (and hopefully winner) Justin Time to cover any mistakes. The top line of Surkhi-Ze'ev, Winter and Laraque were dominant all season, though they'll face stiff competition for points from the line right behind them as Elric, St. Clair and Kobliska enter their prime. On defense, Emil Egli looks poised to play the best hockey of his career, and veteran blueline pair St. Martin and Hunziker will look to repeat as the best defenders in the SHL. Two young rookies, Svatos and Chicken, will join the lineup to add some youth to the veteran roster, hoping to contribute right away and keep the title window open for a long time to come.

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Offline .simo
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#109
12-01-2023, 05:48 PM

ISFL PT

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Offline gurbs
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#110
12-01-2023, 05:56 PM

Our path to the cup this season is as clear as freshly Zambonied ice. We're not just a hockey team; we're a force of nature on skates. Our offense is as relentless as a determined Zamboni driver, smoothing out any obstacles in our way. Our forwards are more precise than a slapshot in sudden death OT, and they're scoring goals faster than you can say, 'Why did the hockey player bring string to the game? To tie up the score!' The defense is tighter than a hockey mom's grip on a thermos full of hot cocoa in the stands. They're checking opponents with the precision of someone making sure the ice isn't too thin. We're leaving our opponents colder than the rink after the Zamboni does its job. Our goalie is a brick wall, stopping pucks like they're bad dad jokes—impossible to get past. And speaking of dad jokes, here's one for you: Why did the hockey puck go to therapy? It had been through a lot of slap shots!

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Offline Jakesdy
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#111
12-01-2023, 06:23 PM

OPTION 1 - Rock that dad bod
Well, we going to train hard and trying to be the best on ice. As my dad says: "Who does not work, that shall not eat". We lost some good players on our team, for example Theodore Svatos (Good luck to him and see'ya on ice). We'll be analyze our opponent's game and build our strategy based on it. Also, we'll be keep good physcal shape. Working on mentality is also imporantant. We'll help our rookies to don't worry on important games. Also don't forget about our experience. It will defenitly help me and the others to show beatiful and good hockey. We are full of desire to improve ourselves and become stronger and that's why I think we can definitely take the cup this season. We will see how it turns out in reality very soon, and rest assured, we will make sure that my prediction turns out to be as accurate as possible.
As my dad says: "Who seeks, that always find".

164 Words

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Offline Mazatt
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#112
12-01-2023, 07:46 PM (This post was last modified: 12-01-2023, 07:46 PM by Mazatt.)

Prompt 1

How will Manhattan win the cup this season? I guess the bigger question is why they want to win it, you can get em for cheap at the dollar store! Just kidding, just kidding. Manhattan is winning the cup for one simple reason: we got rookies. At least 5, to be exact. Especially on defense, the youth that is going to be provided by Nik Smith, Shnopple Lopple, and Nick Mayhem is going to energize the Rage into the playoffs--no doubt about it. And that's without mentioning former Kraken Alexej Kastraba stepping in to fill a huge scoring role for the team. Questions like, "how are you going to win the cup with such a young team" or "going from the worst team in the league to winning the cup is impossible" and, well yeah they are pretty valid questions to ask. The easy answer? Because I want them to. No one else has my personal drive to will their team to the cup from the minors, and that's just a fact.

Code:
like 160 words i forgot to count before posting it

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Offline tomtommen
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#113
12-01-2023, 09:12 PM (This post was last modified: 12-01-2023, 09:12 PM by tomtommen. Edit Reason: typo )

Written Task: Describe how your team is going to win the cup this season, because obviously they are. Include at least one dad joke.

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for S74 because this season, the Calgary Dragons are breathing fire and aiming for glory! First off, our strategy is to tighten up the defense, creating a fortress around our goalie so impenetrable that even a dad joke couldn't sneak through! Speaking of which, why did the hockey player go to jail? Because he was caught "high-sticking" around! But seriously, our offense is set to soar like a puck in overtime. With Tom Pedersen leading the charge on the left wing, we're lining up shots so precise, they're asking to be framed in the net. Furthermore, our power plays are smoother than Zamboni ice. We're dishing out passes crisper than a freshly baked batch of hockey-puck cookies (If you eat those, käka puck as they say in Sweden, you’ll lose your teeth as a true hockey player). Lastly, our team spirit? Stronger than a hockey mom's enthusiasm at a 6 AM practice! We've brewed a team spirit that's tighter than a flying dove’s asshole, uniting us in pursuit of the Cup. So, grab your jerseys and your sense of humor. We are skating towards victory, armed with boom-bastic plays, killer dad jokes, and enough enthusiasm to melt the ice! Go Dragons.

Words: 206

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Offline enigmatic
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#114
12-01-2023, 09:21 PM

If you drink too much alcohol, you're called an alcoholic...... but if you drink too much rhum do you know what you're called? A rhumantic... hehehehehe.

Anyway, it has nothing to do with what I'm gonna write about but I neded to include a dad joke so there you go. Rhum is also alcohol, which makes this joke even more terrible.

The Minnesota Monarchs will win the cup because they're just great and they even make the playoffs now! Yay! It makes winning a cup easier, doesn't it? We will be a bunch of bench warmers, watching Meta Knight fuck up the other teams. Well, I will be a bench warmer. Dragging the team down. But Meta Knight will bring us to glory. Meta Knight is the man. Occasionally Alexi Piastri too, I guess. And Nevek Kove who now generates offense (wtf).... and um... everyone else I will not mention in this PT. Our team hasn't won shit in a while and we, as well as our fans, are hungry for some wins.

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Offline trashae
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#115
12-01-2023, 11:15 PM

The Detroit Falcons are going to run away with the cup this season. We're going to dominate the J so thoroughly that next season we have to go down to three lines.  The wall to wall dominance is going to be remembered as "The Greatest Show on Ice."  The Armada will be Ar-done-a.  The Timber shall fall.  The Berserkers will look like monks next to our ferocity. The Raptors are already wrapped up.  Hummingbirds won't even be afraid of the Scarecrows when we're done.  Battleborn? More like stillborn.  Elk are what's for dinner.  Knights will get demoted to squires.  Whalers are too busy looking down into the sea to notice the Falcons dive-bombing their season.  Malamutes gonna get mala-muted.  Kraken won't be recognizable as a hockey organization after they're cracked open.  Citadelles will become funeral homes.  Winnie the Pooh is going to be more feared than the Grizzlies.  The Falcons are going to rewrite the SMJHL landscape this season because we're simply the best. Better than all the rest. Better than anyone. Anyone I've ever met.  I'm stuck on your heart. I hang on every word you say.Tear us apart. Baby, I would rather be dead.


Offline Leafs4ever
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#116
12-02-2023, 12:52 AM

If the Elk are going to win the 4 Star Cup this season, we need our defence to shut down the opposing team. We've had seasons since I've been here where we have some high scoring forwards, but haven't gone anywhere with that. So, it comes down to the defence being able to limit the damage on our end. Those goals that the forwards are scoring need to be enough to win. As a group, we need to move the puck out of our zone way quicker. Find the forwards and make the outlet pass quickly so the opponent doesn't have time to get into position. We also need to clear the front of the net much better and give our goalie the best chance to save every shot they see.

If we can clean up defensively, we have a chance every time we hit the ice. As the veteran on the blue line, I told coach I'm ready to lead and he just responded, "Hi ready to lead, I'm coach." I had to just skate off the ice.

(179 words)

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Offline LordBallGag
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#117
12-02-2023, 02:00 AM

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ISFL PT +2

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Offline Massive Coiler
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#118
12-02-2023, 05:03 AM

OPTION 2 - monkaS

Well the first thing that came into my mind was the thought of taking a dump in the gloves and skates of everyone on the other team. However, upon reflection, this is wildly impractical. I mean, that's a lot of poop. Too much for me. And also, they can probably DNA test the leavings and figure out it was me and it will come back around resulting in horrific punishment for me and my team. So I decided to evolve from that childish plan and become a dog walker. Over the course of the season, I will accumulate so much dog turd that I will be able to heat it up and slop it into the gear of the rival team's equipment and have it nearly be fresh quality. This way, there will be no DNA test to bring me into questioning and my team is off the hook entirely. I mean, imagine putting your gloves on and getting a handful of that. Or your skates and getting a gripper full of it. Disgusting. You can't play a game after something like that, so it's over.

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Offline st4rface
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#119
12-02-2023, 06:28 AM

OPTION 1 - WRITTEN TASK

This is my rookie season and I'm playing for Toronto "North Stars". It will be tough and I'm playing for underdogs, but we might win the championship. Mainly, because we have a young and good core which already had a decent pre-season. Each game and team training we will improve and get better. Team knows what we have to accomplish. If we won't be able to win the chip this season, the father of Theo Kondos will make us win it. Toronto isn't at it's lowest. Team is getting back to getter and it's only way up from now. We have solid lines on offense, arguably a good defense and decent goalies. With hard work, passion and many trainings - we can win it all for sure. Just gotta stay focused and use our chances. We have to build a great locker room chemistry and make all players of our team to want to succeed. Then everything is possible.

158 words

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Offline Tesla
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#120
12-02-2023, 08:43 AM

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