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dylanjj37 · 10-05-2019, 05:51 PM

SHL Alliterating Player Analysis and Super Star Squad

Recently I decided to give ratings to every player in the SHL and form my top roster, ignoring any boring rules like the salary cap. However, once I started looking at the index, I realised just how many players there were and I realised there was no way I was going to spend time rating every single one of over three hundred players. Instead, I decided to choose a subset of players that would be a lot smaller but that would still give me enough players to be able to form a complete roster. Thinking of this subset was hard, as I didn't know how I would pick players, but thankfully I took inspiration from one particular player and decided to do a team made up of players with alliterative names. This gave me thirty three players to choose from. However, some of these players didn't score that highly on my rating system and yet due to lack of players at their position, were by default on my final roster. Therefore, I extended my rating system to look at players in the SMJHL as well, which added seventeen more players for me to choose from. Overall, there were fifty players on S50 rosters that had alliterative names and yet only two teams had no alliterative players at all – the Anaheim Outlaws of the SMJHL and the New England Wolfpack (although it has been pointed out that Georgy Gorbachenko is one of their prospects). The ratings were done using a top secret system developed by myself, which used a variety of factors to give a final rating out of ten. Players listed in italics are in the SMJHL. I also decided to call the final roster the Super Star Squad due to it being alliterative. I know it sucks.

Centers

Barry Batsbak (Calgary Dragons) – 7/10
Bjornoson Bjornosonson (Halifax Raiders) – 6/10
Jill Jellybeanov (Toronto North Stars) – 0/10
Kevin Kazarian (Toronto North Stars) – 3/10
Knute Knurtsson (San Francisco Pride) – 7/10
Max Mauldin (Los Angeles Panthers) – 9/10
Mister McCarty (Winnipeg Jets) – 1/10
Tate Treehouse (Minnesota Chiefs) – 0/10
Tor Tuck (Edmonton Blizzard) – 8/10
Zivan Zidek (Hamilton Steelhawks) – 8/10

First up are the centers. There was a reasonable amount of centers to choose from and surprisingly only one center playing on a junior team. Some centers such as Tate Treehouse and Jill Jellybeanov received zero, meaning they failed to achieve even the simplest of criteria. One of the factors I used for these ratings was activity which meant that the only players who could possibly get zero out of ten are those that are inactive.

Wings

Anthony Archer (Colorado Raptors) – 9/10
Arsene Arsenich (Hamilton Steelhawks) – 3/10
Backdoor Barnacle (Manhattan Rage) – 1/10
Barrett Blackwood (St. Louis Scarecrows) – 8/10
Bobby Bobcalf (Vancouver Whalers) – 9/10
Boruvka Banananak (Edmonton Blizzard) – 6/10
Calogero Crudelli (Colorado Raptors) – 7/10
Cameron Carter II (Chicago Syndicate) – 9/10
Donnie Dicks (Hamilton Steelhawks) – 6/10
Jaguar Johnson (Carolina Kraken) – 6/10
Kaarlo Kekkonen (Detroit Falcons) – 6/10
Kalevolaripaavo Kaspertommevisnapuu (Kelowna Knights) – 7/10
Karl Krashwagen (Halifax Raiders) – 6/10
Mika Mayfield (Minnesota Chiefs) – 10/10
Nick Novak (Buffalo Stampede) – 3/10
Reginald Rove (Manhattan Rage) – 1/10
Tyler Tougard (Texas Renegades) – 7/10

At first, I split the wingers up into left and right wings, going by the position on the index. However, there were so few wings that this is actually the position that convinced me to add junior players to gain more depth. I tested out the lines with players divided and together, and the top players were the same both times so I grouped them together on this list. Notably, Mika Mayfield is one of only three players who was given a 10 out of 10 rating.

Defense

Berry Blue (Anchorage Armada) – 6/10
Bob Bergen (New Orleans Specters) – 9/10
Cal Clucker (Lethbridge Lions) – 6/10
Casey Creller (Calgary Dragons) – 8/10
Chuck Crutchfield (Winnipeg Jets) – 8/10
Disisde Dayudie (Lethbridge Lions) – 9/10
FR Finn-Rhys (Halifax Raiders) – 7/10
Gary Grease (Winnipeg Jets) – 9/10
Georgy Gorbachenko (Colorado Raptors) – 7/10
Jaakko Jarvinen (Halifax Raiders) – 2/10
Karsten Kadinger (West Kendall Platoon) – 3/10
Leopold Lockhart (San Francisco Pride) – 10/10
Luc-Pierre Lespineau-Lebrunette (St. Louis Scarecrows) – 6/10
Rasmus Rasmus (Winnipeg Jets) – 1/10
Sean Stevenson Jr. (New Orleans Specters) – 8/10
Slip McScruff (Winnipeg Jets) – 8/10
Tokek Takshak (Manhattan Rage) – 6/10
Viktor Valentine (Calgary Dragons) – 3/10

Defense was stacked just as much as centers and adding juniors didn't really help make the decision any easier. The biggest problem when it came to defense was that the majority of the players were active. The rating system already factored in giving active players higher priority than inactives but I hadn't expected there to be so many actives. This is probably the position in which you could swap players out and still have just as good a team as I had to leave out players that would have made the team if they played in a different position. The most notable of these was Disisde Dayudie, who despite getting a rating of 9 out of 10 was left off the roster as I gave priority to players in the SHL. The only defenseman with a higher rating was Leopold Lockhart with 10.

Goalies

Beaujeaux Biscuit (West Kendall Platoon) – 7/10
Benjamin Blue (Tampa Bay Barracuda) – 10/10
Mark McFleury (Minnesota Chiefs) – 2/10
Monty Montgomery (Halifax Raiders) – 2/10
Tommy Tuck (Edmonton Blizzard) – 8/10

Choosing goalies was much easier, although given that three of the five available goalies had a rating of seven or more, I did feel bad that someone had to be left off. What made the difference between Tommy Tuck and Beaujeaux Biscuit was Tuck's 239 more TPE, pushing him above the cut off line to increase his rating. Other than this, the two goalies were practically neck and neck in every other factor. At the front of the crowd was Benjamin Blue who, if I had to choose, would probably my top player of the entire roster and who received the last of three 10 out of 10 ratings.

Super Star Squad

Note: I didn't put too much thought into the actual lines and pairings. The players are listed by rating, with SHL players listed before any junior players who made the team. Also, to make it easier to choose between players who had the same rating, there is an extra center and an extra defense, to give a total roster of twenty two players.

Mika Mayfield – Max Mauldin – Tyler Tougard
Cameron Carter II – Zivan Ziden – Boruvka Banananak
Donnie Dicks – Tor Tuck – Bobby Bobcalf
Anthony Archer – Knute Knurtsson – Barrett Blackwood
Barry Batsbak

Leopold Lockhart – Bob Bergen
Gary Grease – Casey Creller
Sean Stevenson Jr. - Chuck Crutchfield
Slip McScruff

Benjamin Blue
Tommy Tuck