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**OrbitingDeath** · 07-06-2021, 07:45 AM

Vorian Atreides is over 10000 years old but he never ever ate a corn dog. He has no idea what it would taste like. Would it taste like corn? Or would it taste like a puppy? He is too scared to try this out.

Gifter of Bikes · 07-06-2021, 08:34 AM

For all the old timers out there, Christoph Klose took two penalties in the Cup Finals, game 7, for Minnesota. One was with under 2 minutes to go, the other in the first 2 minutes of overtime. Minnesota gave up 2 goals to lose the series and the Cup. The next season, Minny won the Cup with Klose getting redemption by scoring the Cup-winning goal.

***By-Tor*** · 07-06-2021, 08:40 AM

Marcel Beck was the second player created for the S60 draft class. (Anton Harrier was the first). (But if you want to get *technical*, Beck was the first player actually created after the trade deadline).

Credit to enigmatic, Merica, and tweedledunn for sigs

SewingWithNancy · 07-06-2021, 08:42 AM

Its no secret that Sean Gatez used to host pizza parties for the Maine Timber from time to time. Well in all his time in Maine, and from confirmation from management, Bigga Foryu ate 5 whole large pizzas by himself in one sitting. A team record by all accounts and no one will be beating that anytime soon. Duncan the Whale came close, but it was too much pizza dough and not nearly enough fish for him.

@UberBJ @SouthPaw

***Acsolap*** · 07-06-2021, 08:50 AM

Fun fact. Rex Kirkby is the only player to win the bojo biscuit award three times in a row. Cassius Darrow narrowly missed out winning two in a row and being nominated a third time.

Credit to Ml002, King, Wasty, Carpy, Bruins10, Rum_Ham, Turd Ferguson, Ragnar and Enigmatic for the sigs.
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santej29 · 07-06-2021, 09:09 AM

Sabarro T holds the Zerker record for shots missed in a single game, or season, or for that matter very few league wide can challenge his uncanny ability to line one up from the point, or slot, or even 4 feet in front of the goalie and flat out miss the net! ... it is a skill very few ever have possessed in the J, but hey, we are all good at something, right??

-- 75 words

Clean Andrei Kostitsyn · 07-06-2021, 09:19 AM

i hav best shootawt persentadge in leeg. is not joke. is troo. is very sad dat der is not stat show in list becose evrywan coud see andrei is best shootawt player. thank

***Chevy*** · 07-06-2021, 09:35 AM

Strom Chamberlain was the oldest rookie (at the time) to be drafted into the SMJHL and then the SHL. He also holds the Anaheim record for goaltenders for longest length of play with a broken hand.

Kraagenskul · 07-06-2021, 09:50 AM

Fun fact: Zebulon Leavitt holds the record for the most goals scored in a game when wearing pink and purple polka-dotted underwear. At least is assumed he does because no other player has confessed to scoring while wearing that particular item of clothing.

notoriousTRON · 07-06-2021, 10:12 AM

@honkerrs player Scoochie Stratton is an actual alien. I don't know how he got a job with an SHL team but I'm happy he's not in Toronto anymore because he was always stealing my Reeses Pieces and blaming other teammates.

Sig Cred: Carpy, ML, RainDelay, Donini & Geekusoid

enigmatic · 07-06-2021, 10:22 AM

Jasper Maximov is kind of psychic... He has a fifth sense! It's like he has ESPN or something... his chest can always tell when it's going to rain.

Mooney · 07-06-2021, 10:22 AM

Every time Patrik Money gets a goal or assist, his beard grows longer. After a succesful rookie season, he had to shave his beard down to half length as it was beginning to get in the way of his stick

***Inf1d3l*** · 07-06-2021, 10:29 AM

Stan Din'desque is addicted to Apex Legends. He plays it every chance he can get, which luckily does not tend to interfere with his work ethic, likely because he's freaking terrible at it!

zeagle1 · 07-06-2021, 10:50 AM

Mew Two has the most points ever by a 350 TPE player I think. Definitely at least in the new sim he does.
fun fact: he did not win MVP for this record setting performance

*slothfacekilla* · 07-06-2021, 11:01 AM

Jimmy Slothface was the first ever non-expansion draft pick of the New Orleans Specters franchise and was a part of them winning their fist championship. He also recently hit his 600th career point.

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