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LordBirdman · 04-23-2022, 07:52 PM

Tempers boiled over Friday night in San Francisco after the Pride stunned the Los Angeles Panthers in a Game 4 OT victory. The Pride stole Game 4, winning the game 3-2 despite being heavily outshot and outplayed most of the game. Pride netminder Nicolae Antonescu continued his impressive playoff run with an outstanding performance, stopping 54 of the 56 shots he faced. Former top 10 draft pick Yngve Simonsson was the hero of the night for the Pride, ending the game in double OT with a beautiful shot off the face off win from longtime Pride standout Henrik Lekberg Osterman. While the San Francisco faithful were treated to an exciting experience on the ice, they couldn’t possibly have predicted to get even more excitement from what happened off the ice.

After the typical post game media non-answer sessions from both teams, San Francisco super fans waited in the parking lot for the team to make their autograph rounds before going out for further celebrations. The jovial Pride players were engaging with fans when people began to notice the Los Angeles Panthers bus parked at the exit to the parking lot with the whole team standing outside, led by winger Jimmy Wagner. The Panthers players, adorned in their dirty and ripped sweat pants, began to walk towards the handsomely dress Pride players in their suits.

Wagner called out, “Hey jerks, we are going to kick your butts!”

Sven Svenson, the towering handsome Viking-like reigning Ron Mexico Award Winner, let out a hearty chuckle as he at first confused the approaching Panthers for a roving gang of homeless people now common in San Francisco.

The Pride players quickly realized what was coming their way as they broke away from their fans and their sharpies to face the now running Panthers players. What came next would hardly be believable if it weren’t captured on video that has now gone viral on various social media sites.

The unshowered Panthers and the pristine Pride clashed in the center of the parking lot like a large wave crashing over a child’s feeble sandcastle. Bedlam ensued and it quickly became apparent that the Pride players were beating the shit out of the Panthers.

Henrik Lekberg Osterman was seen holding back the arms of Joseph Weston while Slavakov Vladimirashenko unloaded repeated body blows into the veteran winger.

Videos showed Rikard Bjerg holding Slip McScruff by his hair while simultaneously headbutting Rock Strongo.

Yngve Simonsson was seen trying to feed the game winning puck he kept into the mouth of “Long” John Donair.

Jack Klompus deployed several knees to the gut of Mikkel Asmus Sondergard.

Cormac Pónaire was curled in a ball under the bus having defecated himself.

Suddenly it appeared as though a circle of players had formed in the center of the parking lot. In the circle, Jimmy Wagner and Sven Svenson slowly circled, sizing each other up. Wagner removed his dirty Carolina Kraken t-shirt while Svenson deftly removed his stylish suit jacket. Svenson then let out a deep, intimidating war cry and Wagner suddenly had the wild look of a cornered animal in his eye. In the flash of an eye, Svenson had managed to position Wagner over his knee and was voraciously spanking his bottom. It was unclear exactly what Svenson said as he scolded Wagner in his native Swedish while Wagner yelped like a cat in heat.

After a brief moment that felt like an eternity, the Panthers players staggered backed to their bus battered and bruised. The Panthers drove away in their bus while the Pride walked away to go celebrate their hard-fought victory on and off the ice. Of course, the Pride disavow off-ice violence and were acting in self-defense.

Fortunately for the Los Angeles Panthers, injuries are turned off in the SHL.