Login

Pickle Juice · 03-24-2023, 10:05 PM

I think Ty Murphy could beat death at a straight up stamina competition. Just mountains for hours. A bag skate, first to hurl loses. Honestly its probably that level of vanity that ended up killing T Murph anyway, he's always staring at himself in mirrors. Pretty vain for someone who hasn't really done shit in this league. Heavy is the head that bears the "underrated" crown. Who gives a shit about underrated players 10 years after retirement? Homers, and that's really it. Who is going to be talking about Jaden Schwartz or David Perron 10 years after their retirement besides blues fans of the 2019 Cup winning team? Nobody. So even if death wins in the cardio competition, Murphy's funeral will be a lonely day. Maybe a neighbor or two, but what will they say? "Ty was a bill payin son of a bitch, he always paid his bills on time". Real touching shit man, real touching.

***aleks*** · 03-24-2023, 10:36 PM

High Stick King · 03-24-2023, 11:16 PM

Quote:WRITTEN TASK: What skills competition do you think you can beat Death at? Why? Would you try to cheat, or just give it your best shot?

Spack Jarrow wakes up to find himself in a strange place. Was it the rum he drank last night or maybe it was whatever that strange thing he inhaled last night? Either way, this is a strange place with a lot of fire and creatures with pointy sticks. Suddenly a shadowy figure appears. It's Death. Immediately Jarrow yells out "I've seen Bill & Ted's 2. I know I get to challenge you in a game!" before Death even had a chance to introduce himself. A loud "sigh" could be heard as Death's shoulders dropped in a defeated gesture as that movie has made his job so much more difficult.
"FINE" bellows out the voice of Death. "CHOOSE YOUR COMPETITION!" as the ground shakes with every syllable.
Spack takes a moment and ponders what he should choose then shouts out in response "I choose the competition of being Spack Jarrow.".
Death cocks his head in confusion while Jarrow continues... "They who are the most accurate me is the winner of the contest.". Jarrow shakes head with a confident nod.

"I DON'T.. YOU CAN'T JUST... THAT ISN'T HOW THIS WORKS!" rumbled the ground.

"I'm pretty sure it is." answered back Jarrow.

Suddenly Jarrow is back at home in his bed. Was it a dream? Did he just hallucinate all of that? Weird.

[ 227 words ]

***RAmenAmen*** · 03-25-2023, 12:12 AM

Prompt 2:

Come on, a skills competition with Death for the fate of my very soul? Every goalie to ever play the game has dreamt of this very moment, and any goalie who says otherwise is lying to you. With a few seasons under his belt, Justin Time is just about ready to show the league why he's going to be an elite SHL goalie by taking on Death himself in a shootout competition. The rules are simple: Like in any shootout, Death gets three opportunities to beat Time for the goal, and three of Time's Blizzard teammates will take the ice to shoot on Death to save their goalie. With his life on the line, Time decided to put his faith in the same trio that will wear the A for the Blizzard this season. The dynamic duo of Benjamin Surkhi-Ze'ev and Luke Laraque are a two man scoring machine breaking into their prime, and wily defenseman Louise St. Martin has a history of quarterbacking the offense, and has the stick skills to score from in close as well as from a distance. Will they be enough to save their captain? Death agreed to postpone the consequences of the shootout until after the upcoming season, so you'll have to stay tuned to find out!

***SouthPaw*** · 03-25-2023, 01:10 AM

Growing the game of hockey will be one of the easiest things that Nibbles The Squirrel has ever done. If you are wondering why that is it is because the game of hockey practically sales itself. There is nothing else like it in the world and I do not think there ever will be. So all it will take is finding some way to introduce ice into this dimension and Nibbles natural ability will take care of the rest. Now I am not sure if he will have any of his hockey equipment or not but, for sake of the word count on this PT I am going to say that he does and it will really streamline the introduction and growth of the game of hockey in this dimension. With all of his equipment with him Nibbles can show off his moves and get everyone excited and have the people their manufacture everything they need using the stuff that Nibbles brought with him!

Code:
164 words

*SimmiZ* · 03-25-2023, 02:36 AM

ISFL affiliate

Mutedfaith · 03-25-2023, 06:35 AM

PROMPT 1: Your player has died and been reincarnated in another world of your choosing. Unwilling to give up on your game, but finding it doesn't exist in your new world, you now need to introduce and grow the game of hockey in this alternate dimension!

WRITTEN TASK: Tell me how you would explain hockey to your friends in the other world? What do you use for gear? What do you use as a rink? Does it catch on? Would you change the rules? Go nuts!

Allright, this is the chance I was waiting for to perfect the game of hockey, without the people who are still living in the 80s hockey vibe throwing a hissy fit over it. Because too many people still consider fighting and dirty hits a legit part of hockey, and that has to stop.

I would create the game of hockey as we have it now, but with more severe punishments for dangerous, reckless and dumb hits. And completely ban anything involving fighting. You fight? Automatic match penalty, and a 5 game suspension. Do it twice in a season? You can fuck the fuck off for the rest of the season. Team get involved in anything that goes beyond a one-on-one fight? Automatic loss. Line brawl? Loss and points deducted.

Hockey doesn't need fighting, in fact: fighting is holding hockey back from growing into the USA's #1 sport, and from it becoming more popular in large parts of Europe. The violence people still link to hockey is keeping parents from allowing their kids to play, and this would be a perfect opportunity to recreate the sport without the excessive and unnecessary violence and turn it into the technical showcase of skills it can be.

Crunk · 03-25-2023, 07:57 AM

ISFL Affiliate

***JR95*** · 03-25-2023, 09:28 AM

Cormier found himself in a magical world with no recollection of how he got there. After some exploring, he quickly realized he was taking part in what seemed to be a DnD campaign and he was one of the main characters destined to join a larger party of protagonists. Upon meeting this party, they immediately became infatuated with his hockey gear and it didnt take long for them to want to learn the game. Cormier was more than happy to show them, but it was quite difficult to keep some characters from having magical outbursts when things didn’t go their way. Puck stolen? Fireball. Someone laid you out with a big hit? Fireball. Goalie makes a nice save? Fireball. It took some time but after a while the magic users eventually did learn to veer away from blasting each other with fireballs, and resorted to good old fashioned fist fighting like real hockey players do. Now if only we could teach the archer to not “snipe” the puck quite that way…

*jeffie43* · 03-25-2023, 11:29 AM

ISFL Affiliate

Nour is pretty hot ngl

enigmatic · 03-25-2023, 12:01 PM

Prompt 2

Considering that death knows all things I think I'm fucked either way. I wouldn't try to cheat for that same reason. I don't think death would appreciate it and would get rid of me in the most painful ways possible. I would just do my best, even if it probably would not be enough. Humans, even simulated ones, can't really compete with death. Considering how last season went, I would challenge death to a precision shooting competition, in hockey form of course. I don't think I'd have any chance at winning hardest shot for example because even against fellow SHLers I don't think I'd win so I think that would be my best shot (litterally). I can't really see the reaper being bad at anything so for sure he'd kick my ass and in that case, being sent to another dimension doesn't seem like such a bad punishment. It's better than, you know, being dead.

vbottas17 · 03-25-2023, 12:55 PM

So turns out that Alexi Piastri has found himself in a bit of a situation again.. luckily for him he's always been a pretty big fan of Death because he seems like a pretty bad ass mf that you don't really want to mess around with too much. The two hit it off and decide that they will drink some beers and have a friendly hockey competition to decide if Piastri will return to his previous world to keep playing hockey or if he will remain in hell and become the new lead guitar player for Death's band. Piastri decides that this will be a hardest shot competition. Death starts it out and rings a 150 mph snap shot bar down. Piastri has a trick up his sleeve though, he pulls out a bottle of bicardi 151, takes a huge swig, then blows fire at Death's face by burping while sparking a lighter in front of his mouth. This a naturally an instant win as 151 is harder than 150 and the Minnesota Monarchs are pumped to have their new RW back.

tomtommen · 03-25-2023, 01:24 PM

WRITTEN TASK: What skills competition do you think you can beat Death at? Why? Would you try to cheat, or just give it your best shot?

If Tom Pedersen was to try and beat death in a competition he would choose a competition consisting of some kind of eating and drinking contest. As death will be dead and probably have their intestines either rotted away or mushed together without the ability to make the food passage its way through it would be a safe bet. If the intestines are rotted away the food will fall to the floor and thereby be an automatic loss. And as everybody knows if you eat or drink in a competition you have to hold the food or drinks inside. If you puke it up or drop it on the floor you lose.And if there is no passage through the intestines there will not be room for much food nor drinks. And if death tries too hard the intestines will probably burst open and thereby automatically lose. And Tom Pedersen loves to eat and drink and will therefore easily win this.

Words: 161

PremierBromanov · 03-25-2023, 01:47 PM

Promp 1

Tiberius Kane is resurrected in middle earth, much to his unchagrin. In order to grow the game of hockey, each race of middle earth must take part and to that end we have 3 different leagues: The Hobbit league, the Sindarin league, and the Mortal League. Due to the disparity in some of the races in ability and stature, it was necessary to separate some of them. The Hobbit league, so named, is for Hobbits or any folk under 4 feet, including men and dwarves. The Sindarin league is for elves only, or any truly powerful mortal creature. One can think of this league as the top league as elves have unnatural poise and athletic ability as well as incredible intelligence. They are far and away better 99% of the time than any mortal race. However, the league is open to anyone who can crack a roster. Finally, we have the Mortal League. The mortal league is a catch-all for Men, Dwarves, Orcs, or any mortal creature able to play. None of the leagues are prohibitive on race alone, but rather they are merely made separate in order to allow a place for creatures of all statures to play. Thus, the Hobbit league is obviously "not as good" as the other two, and the Mortal League is "not as good" as the elvish league.

*gurbs* · 03-25-2023, 03:13 PM

Tony Soprano had been reincarnated in a world where sports were entirely different from the ones he knew. However, he was determined to bring the game of hockey to this new world. He began by studying the people and their culture to understand their interests and values. He also sought out other individuals who shared his passion for sports. He realized that the new world lacked the necessary infrastructure for hockey, such as ice rinks and equipment. Therefore, he worked tirelessly to create a grassroots movement to introduce the game to the locals. He began by organizing street hockey games in public places, such as parks and open spaces, using makeshift equipment.

As the popularity of the game grew, Soprano and his team started attracting sponsors and investors who saw the potential for the game to grow into a mainstream sport in the new world. With the support of the community, they began building ice rinks, acquiring proper equipment, and training new players.

To gain more exposure for the sport, Soprano also began organizing exhibitions and tournaments, inviting other players from different parts of the world to participate. The games drew large crowds and captured the attention of the media, which helped to further promote the game. In time, the game of hockey grew into a beloved sport in the new world, with the hockey player being hailed as a pioneer for bringing it to the people. His passion and determination had paid off, and he was proud to see how far the game had come in this alternate dimension.

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us