12-14-2020, 10:07 AM(This post was last modified: 12-14-2020, 10:11 AM by Z0REM.)
Dick Clapper
Mike Hroch
Boruvka Banananak
Osbert Whacker
Nick Brain
Nathan Explosion
All of the people in this team have something to do with Penises. If you doubt Brain, then remember that some people say that men can only think with one brain at a time.
LW - Hippo Passamus
C - Eko van Otter
RW - Alexander Roach
LD - Slimey Snail (moving to LD - need his speed)
RD - Fleetway Super Sonic
G - Name Redacted
Going all animals. Mainly because I had to have Hippo Passamus, probably the player with the coolest name ever. I loved getting Roach and Snail on the squad as the mammals shouldn't be able to have it all. Super Sonic is, of course, a hedge hog. Gets tough at goalie, but with the name redacted, I'm pretty sure the real name is Furry Gecko. The added plus being we get to add a reptile to the squad to round things out.
This team is comprised of the oldest SHL players (not users) who haven't been forced into the retirement home (yet) who are still signed and playing on SHL teams (regardless of user activity).
The All Sub 10 Wins (as of writing this) Defensive Team
There are five teams under the ten win mark for the season so I am scraping the bottom of the barrel to make the studliest defense first line possible. Maybe To make things a little more interesting I will only choose one skater from each team. Goalies can be from any team though.
RW- Jakub Bruchevski
JB is second in points and shot blocks on the Wolfpack. He is also the leading goal scorer with 13.
C- Henrik Lekberg Osterman
HLO is second on the Pride in points and blocks and is a key part of the penalty kill.
LW- Collin Gibbles
For my money Gibbles in the premier defensive forward in the SHL and deserves more appreciation. Currently sits third overall in takeaways but is first overall for forwards.
D- Jakob Hamr
Hamr has 100 blocks, nearly 100 hits, and 20 takeaways. A total shutdown defender which often go unnoticed.
D- Nat Emerson
Emerson is tied for the lead in points on the Platoon with 17 and is currently leading the league in shot blocks at 126 and in the much maligned DGR stat with a 92.
G- Geezus Kryyst
It is hard to make an argument for anyone other than Kryyst at this moment in time. He is a key factor in why San Francisco had already surpassed their over under and have kept the Pride from being last in the league.
My entry for this mPT is gonna be the All-Remove-Kebab Team. Residing in, of course, Constantinople (and certainly not Becs or whatever) this team is famous for standing together even against overwhelming odds. It is backstopped by Phillip Weaver who is really good at making money but really bad at keeping his subjects happy. He is supported by the blueline of Andrej Doskočil and Lucas Johansson. Doskocil played a crucial role in removing the Ottomans despite his relative inexperience and has developed into a cornerstone of the coalition since who should be able to provide a lot of help and leadership to the young Johansson, who has already been learning a lot from him these past few weeks. They are complemented a trio of forwards that is Cyril Vskoc, Philipp Winter and Valterri Kauppinen. Vyskoc is another relatively new member of the coalition who overcame a lot of struggles to develop into the powerhouse he is now whereas the constant bickering between Kauppinen and Winter should help the two, who were amongst the two most experienced members of the coalition, push each other to performing at their very best!
Valterri Kauppinen - Cyril Vyskoc - Philipp Winter
Andrej Doskocil - Lucas Johansson
Phillip Weaver
A Chimkin Tendy platter with a side of garbanzo Beanmans, a McPickle wedge, a warm Podcalzone, and some fresh Grape Fruit.
And then wash it all down with a cold Bud Weiser.
The SHL is proud to present the S57 All penalties team!! we often like to glorify those who put up points, and rightfully so, but there are unsung heroes who deserve just as much praise for different reasons! This all star game will be comprised of all the league leaders in penalty minutes!
TEAM 1
Zakkira Diporov - Henrik Lekberg Osterman - Ricky Spanish
Luc-Pierre Lespineau-Lebrunette - Slip McScruff
Ian Venables
TEAM 2
Manuel Gotze - Ethan Duncan - Alex Marshall
DeMaricus Smyth - Chico Smeb
Leo Bloomfield
Rangerjase Commissioner
first site "billionaire" https://simulationhockey.com/gcalendar.php
Nice and simple lineup made from the biggest hitters at their respective position (W,C, D). I then added the goalie with the highest Game Rating for good measure. Good luck anyone going against this.
I am going with the SHL "All-Clutch Team" (*Going by the Index and file on positions" )
C - Nick Brain 6 GWG
RW - Alexander Wachter 5 GWG
LW - Monkey D Luffy 4 GWG
RD - Guy O'Shea 5 GWG
LD - Disisde Dayudie 2 GWG
G - Cillian Kavanagh 4 Shutouts
SMJHL "All-Clutch Team"
C - Zdenko Beranek 6 GWG
RW - Asclepius Perseus Flitterwind 4 GWG
LW - Jarmo Kekalainen 4 GWG
RD - Chris Goodname 4 GWG
LD - Evangelos Giannopoulos 2 GWG
G - Chimkin Tendy 4 Shutouts
12-14-2020, 12:13 PM(This post was last modified: 12-14-2020, 12:17 PM by TomHanks.)
Option B: Present your S57 All-*something* Team
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the all grit grinder team! These are players with a low center of gravity who aren’t afraid to lay people out and take some blows themselves:
C: Andreas Kvalheim
RW: Noah Gallagher
LW: Zakkira Diporov
RD: Luc-Pierre Lespineau-Lebr
LD: DeMaricus Smyth
G - Geezus Kryyst
Alright so up first we have Kvalheim at center. Only center in the league in the top 25 in hits so that is an immediate addition to the squad. More importantly he has the nicest amount of hits in the league with 69. Clear cut grit grinder.
Up next our right winger in Noah Gallagher. Gallagher traditionally plays on the left wing, but no right winger brings what he does to the table here. At 82 hits in 28 games, the man is out here making space left right and center for people to get some shots off. He’s also the only person on this list with double digit goals, and we will need someone to score. Granted not all that much given the opposition shouldn’t be able to stand after the first period but you can’t win if you don’t score.
At left wing we have an absolute stallion in Diporov. 34 penalty minutes which puts him 4th in the league and 105 hits making him the only non-defenseman to crack 100, this is an easy choice to add to the list.
Penultimately, we move on to the real piece de resistance of this squad, our two defenders. Luc-Pierre Lespineau-Lebr is an absolute machine, already up to 195 hits on the year. Only 4 players have cracked 100 and he’s almost above 200 now. He’s also fielded 78 blocked shots without missing a beat. Need more to justify him being on this list? League leader in PIMs. This man is a force to be reckoned with. Alongside him is another player playing slightly out of position. Traditionally a right defender, DeMaricus Smyth is slotted in at the LD role. He earns this recognition by having the second most hits with 162 on the season, and much more importantly he is the only player in the league to have 2 fight wins. And no fight losses at all. When Smyth drops the gloves, he drops his opposition.
And finally we move on to our goalie. This is the toughest one to judge for the purposes of this list, but I ended up going with Geezus Kryyst. I just wanted the player who is out there taking the most beatings in terms of volume of saves who isn't also allowing 4 goals per game. That left me with Kryyst since that eliminated Baltimore's goalie.
There we have it, a team of grit grinders. It’s gonna look like slap shot out there.
Blues
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Tor Tuck (S37) @ErM & 
GOD McZehrl (S40) @Chris-McZehrl
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- Ellis McPickle - Offense
- Vaseline Podcalzone - Offense
- Bean Beanman - Defense
- Bud Weiser - Defense![[Image: U9GyyHt.jpg]](https://i.imgur.com/U9GyyHt.jpg)
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6 GWG
4 GWG
4 GWG
4 GWG
2 GWG![[Image: jumbobone19.gif]](https://sig.grumpybumpers.com/host/jumbobone19.gif)
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![[Image: tomhanks.gif]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/452907607493967875/690760090135035924/tomhanks.gif)
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