“Welcome back to Blizzard Buzz, lads and lasses! This week my partner in crime and I have got quite the treat for ye….as we’ve got the one, the only, HFFO for you in the studio. After a little bit of th…gentle coaxing, we’ve managed to get him and another special guest to sit down for an interview. Isn’t that right Matthias?” Roisin chuckled, smiling gleefully as she passed the microphone to her cohost.

“I’ve never seen such coercive tactics in my life, and frankly, I’m terrified by the depths you will go to, to get someone on our show. I’m glad to be on your side.”

He says with a gulp, as he gestures to the table in the middle of the studio.

“So, HFFO - you’ve had quite the career so far in the SHL - how far do you want to go back, here? Your earliest days must have been quite different than the way things are now, no?”

“I told you I’m not talking until you move the tank of liquid nitrogen from over my head to literally anywhere else.”

Matthias shrugs, and looks over at Roisin

“Look, we don’t need to threaten him, right? Liike, he seems ready to just talk to us…”


“Oh come now Matthias, what's the fun without having a little danger?” Roisin laughed, before sighing, “Alright….I suppose we can indulge him.”. She gestures towards one of the crew to withdraw the tank.

“So listen, I don’t know what you want to know but the Slovakian mafia and I have only done like two deals okay, I can’t help you bring them down by myself.”

He laughs, and passes his microphone to their host - Matthias leans in next to Roisin’s mic, and asks plainly

“Alright, Hiff - we don’t need to solve any criminal actions, or even want to - we’re just three people in a room - two hosts and a guest with a story. Nice and easy, eh?”

He gestures, and winks!

“Whenever you’re ready, eh?”

“Well first of all, Hiff is my father, you can call me Hiffo. But times have changed a lot in some excellent ways by and large. In terms of a culture of accepting and openness to people from all walks of life the league is leagues ahead of where it was. The update portal has come in, regression has come in, teams have expanded, moved, retracted, and all manner of changes have occurred. We’ve seen bannings, suspensions, punishments but nothing truly as bad as a day in Egg’s mind just being posted for the world to see in our locker room.”

“Fair….and I'm right there with you on our….unique co-gm’s…activities if I am being honest. Yet with that being said, what would you say have been the highlights and low points of your tenure?” Roisin asked, shuddering at the mention of Egg.

“I wouldn’t mind an expansion on that now - including the horror’s of Egg’s own subconsciousness, as well?”

He adds, cautiously.

“Imagine if that picture of dugtrio being three super jacked dudes wrapped around each other was a person, it would be Egg, but is there any specific part you’re looking for me to elaborate. Hard to extrapolate on 13+ years of content without direction.”

He laughs to himself, and pokes Roisin

“Well go on then, give him a jumping-off point, eh? Where do we wanna start, back when he first joined? Or maybe we want to start at the present and work backwards?”

“Well, why don’t we start when he first joined, mhm? Might give him a more comfortable point to start with.” Roisin laughed, shuddering at Hiffo’s comment.

“Sure, I joined back in Season 5, got recruited by Ace off HFBoards, we were in a text based GM league on there which is as nuts as it sounds but I loved it. I joined alongside Hallsy and JumpierPegasus aka he of the Zach Miller award. I went 3rd overall in my first draft to Kelowna, where we proceeded to have the, at the time, worst record in NWJHL history. NWJHL is SMJHL but it’s previous name. We faced the Prince George Firebirds in the first round who were historically good and beat them in 7. My player, Saku Perhonen scored a hat trick in game 7 to eliminate them which was a great feeling. We then got destroyed by Detroit next round who won the cup.”

“That’s such a crazy thing, to be present way back at the inception like that - what did NWJHL even stand for, Hiffo?”

He turns to look, and his eyes meet with Roisin’s

“And what was it like coming to meet with Ace way back when?”

“I wasn’t at the inception but I was close relatively, the NWJHL was the North Western Junior Hockey League, couldn’t tell you why. Ace was very similar in a lot of ways but he’s also grown in some excellent ways too but he’s been a great guy and friend since then and somebody I’m happy to know.”
“Ace from the few times I’ve spoken with them has been a joy to chat with. They’ve been not only very helpful in learning the ins and outs of the league, but just in general. I think that between that and how knowledgeable they are, you can’t ask for a better friend to have. So when you say that you two get along quite well I can definitely see why.” Roisin said, nodding in affirmation as she looked back to Matthias, “That being said, I’m curious how that affects things on the ice…”

“What were locker rooms even like back then, I wonder - did it have the same camaraderie that they do now? I mean, Discord has only been around for… oh wow, nine years. Wow, never mind, I feel old, now, shit.”

He laughs, and playfully flicks Hiffo on the shoulder

“C’mon now, you little bundle of secrets, share your knowledge with us!”


“Locker rooms were actually on site for a long time, you’d have a forum based locker room where you’d talk to nobody besides your GM if you were the only active player on your team. Forums were also a lot more active with some nonsense general topics and a lot of hockey discussion. Then chatzy came out and people moved there, big haxball tournaments arose and fun was had by all. Eventually we all migrated to discord and now here we are. The camaraderie was different, I have a nostalgic look to it since it was my first player but there was a fair amount of it but smaller amounts of people and less instant communication makes me doubt it was as close. The levels of acceptance and openness to people of all sexualities, genders, identities and creeds has drastically improved as well and made the site a much better place.”

“That’s something I’ve noticed talking to a lot of the old timers, Hiff. Back pre season 70, it seems like the forums and such were far more wild than they are today. That said, it makes sense given the different atmosphere of the era.” she says, giving a playful laugh before adding, “So do you ever miss those days Hiff or do you prefer the modern era of the site more?”

“I feel like I touched on this but I do miss the first player feeling of the site when everything was new but the current era of the site is in a much better place and ran leagues better.”

He takes a long sip from his mug, and leans back in his chair, before reaching down below the desk and lifting the Blizzard Buzz officially licensed self-defence broadsword, and placing it delicately on the table in front of HFFO.

“Here - a gift! We’re still gonna wrack your brains as much as possible, but that doesn’t mean we can’t do a little quid pro quo! When was your first real taste of GMing, the moment that made you say ‘oh yeah, I can do this after all.’”

“Good gods, Matthias…” Roisin said, shaking her head as she sighed. Looking back to the camera she said, “Thank you for joining us for the third edition of Blizzard Buzz. We’ll be back next week.”

Please pay @Ara the full amount per @Atheist_Caliph 's request.