The two fateful people to be married are Ben Jammin (@James Truong) and Vincent Fox (@Jimmysmo27). Two star crossed, star players in the J cross paths through Kelowna and Carolina's spirited matches. In the offseason, the Edmonton and Montreal prospects get together for their cross-country matrimony, but unfortunately for them, the Blizzard aren't fans. Tyler Ward (@Hordle) is the first to speak up at the reception, making the claim that Ben is a rampant cheat, that he's been seen on the pastures with Julio, south down the highway to Calgary to see Axel, or even out east to visit the whole of Newfoundland. Claims fly out but are ignored, as no one has arrived yet. Ward has simply arrived early and is telling this to the french priest as he practices his vows. Alas, he cannot reach ears that wish not to hear. As Ward dips into some fine wine that his salary can totally afford, he forgets all about his qualms and realizes love is love.

When the rest of the Blizzard arrive, they respectfully take their seats to watch the ceremony. As the priest asks if there are any objections, hands shoot up. First is Kyle Sutton (@CrazyMojito), shouting "Ben told me he wanted to run me up against some boards!" The rest of the crowd thinks that's just an innocent, innocuous way to refer to a hit. But he continues, "he also said he couldn't wait to be put in my arms!" Murmurs start to rise. Did Ben Jammin want to draw a holding penalty, or? Slavakov (@Bfine) jumps in for support, "Ben said he was gonna make me choose between he and Tony Pepperoni for 69!" Audible gasps are heard. How scandalous. Axel Foley rises next "Ben Jammin told me this could be us if I play my cards right!" The crowd is more understanding this time, Vincent looking to Ben in admiration, "Holy fuck, Ben is smooth..." Even sophomore player Sven Svechnikov (@steveoiscool) speaks up, "Ben said he was gonna keep an eye on me for other reasons." For the final nail in the coffin, Makrus Jager (@taterswc) "Ben told me I was his fantasy."

Vincent looks to Ben longingly. "Is this true." Ben says odd french stuff that no one understands, but it sounds really cool. French really is the language of love. Vincent nods somberly. "Well if you promise not to..." he turns to the pastor "we'll do it anyways." Shock. Anger. Sadness? All feelings in the chapel as the priest gestures to the baguette cross (when in Quebec, as they say) as the marriage is officiated. Finally, Tony Pepperoni (@"TommySalami") Edmonton's Santa Claus, walks into the church with cases and cases of twisted tea. "Baltimore sends their regards." And like that, the meat man was gone.

It was truly a magical event.