Login

Tlk742 · 09-30-2018, 09:55 PM

Season after season, the Whalers have failed to fell the Kelowna Knights. This time, Soren Kierkegaard has taken a leap of faith and done what his team has entrusted him to do, make sure the Whalers win it all. The easy option would be to put his TPE into faceoffs, but that’s not going to happen, so instead, he’s going to convince them, that to get started on repeating they must doubt, and hope that the doubt drives them to insanity. You know small things, like the only way to achieve happiness is to doubt the very things taught at an early age, like skating, shooting, and scoring techniques. Then from there using that doubt to uproot everything that made them good and an effective team that would allow them to compete, and force them into poor cohesion as they start to doubt each other to do their job. Also he spiked their drinks with laxatives. That too.

Moosecop · 09-30-2018, 10:43 PM

PBE PT

***Ohtaay*** · 09-30-2018, 11:19 PM

SPOILERS FOR AMERICAN VANDAL SEASON 2

Well I recently finished watching american vandal season 2. What was the key to season two of american Vanadal? The turd burglar! I would hire a turd burglar to enter edmontons training facilities and setup a variety of turd burglar pranks. The one prank would be taken directly from the tv series. The team gatorade jugg would be laced with laxatives, making the entire edmonton team forced to shit during the game. The second turd burglar prank would be adding turds to each players skates. When they put on their skates, they would be stepping in shit. Grossing them out, and forcing them to clean out / find new skates for the game. The final prank would be to soak their jerseys in the scent of shit, making it impossible to wear their team jerseys without a vigorous wash process.

I believe these three pranks would make it very hard for the edmonton team to play in their matchup against us.

JVMjrDOT · 09-30-2018, 11:27 PM

PBE PT

Radsin · 09-30-2018, 11:52 PM

So, obviously we don't like the Whalers right now. I'm pretty sure they eliminated us last season, and now they are winning a FUCK ton. So we gotta stop all that noise, no matter what it takes. I had the dope plan of lacing their Gatorade with shrooms. My plan was to do it week after week at random times to go ahead and even out whatever HGH they are taken. First time I went to do it, ended up just eating all of the mushrooms and, sleeping in their locker room. Its really nice actually, and I had a wonderful trip and nap. I came to the realization that it's probably not cool to lace peoples stuff and it could potentially ruin lives. So instead im trying to get rid of this half pound of caps I bought. So hit me up i'll do 8ths for twenty five.

(153 words)

to12143 · 10-01-2018, 12:00 AM

NSFL PT

Bzerkap · 10-01-2018, 12:31 AM

NSFL PT

ViN · 10-01-2018, 12:43 AM

Steelhead77 · 10-01-2018, 01:10 AM

---> ParmBorg Highlights <---

#1 All-Time SHL Goal & Point Scorer
- First 2,000 TPE Player in SHL History -
- First 400 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- Only 500 Goal Scorer in SHL History -
- First GM to Win 5 & 6 Challenge Cups -
Esa Anrikkanen Award - SMJHL ROY - Est. S34
Vidrik Onoprienko Award Winner - S45

Dragonite

***39alaska39*** · 10-01-2018, 01:13 AM

With there being less than ten games in the regular season, the Raptors had to formulate a plan as to how they could catch the Whalers as they were the only team currently ahead of them. Alex Winters knew that he had to do something to prevent them from getting further ahead of them. Luckily, Alex knew a few people on the inside, including former teammate Andrew Martin. The plan he and the members of the Raptors formulated was simple: they would meet with Martin, learn about the habits of key players Carlo Russo, Tokek Takshak, Luke Thomason, and Erik Skalbergs, and find the perfect opportunity to steal their talents, much like the Monstars in Space Jam.

This plan was working exceptionally well for the Raptors until Martin, along with Bill Murray, appeared at the arena. Alex Winters and the Raptors were furious, but there was little they could do to stop Bill and Andrew from taking the powers of the four players back. The Raptors would just have to catch the Whalers on their own.

Alex Winters (retired)
Matej Winters (retired)
Dominik Winters
S45 Jesster Trophy Winner
Challenge Cup Winning Goal Club: S52

Slappydoodle · 10-01-2018, 10:04 AM

This season Challenge Cup defending champs, the Calgary Dragons, are in a struggle to make the playoffs and defend what is rightfully theirs. As a result Calgary GM and Sith lord Darth Esa Soze has been pulling out all the stops to derail his opponents without mercy.

The Los Angeles Panthers have suffered the most. Under hypnotic suggestion, they have been coerced into watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians and the various Real Housewives franchises during all their spare time. This has, of course, been rotting their brains and causing them to spontaneously bleed out of their ears, as it does to all viewers of this trash. There are rumors it has caused heavy rectal discharge as well, though this is as yet unconfirmed.

There was an attempt to make the Edmonton Blizzard players become sexually attracted to sheep. This was abandoned when it was discovered that most of them already were anyway.

JSS · 10-01-2018, 11:05 AM

As part of my rookie season in Buffalo. I was assigned to prank our rivals, the Toronto North Stars before or after a game. Now, I knew this was coming so I had lots of time to prepare and think about what I could do. I thought about a million and one ideas on what I could do, the difficult part was trimming down all the options to the perfect prank. It was so hard choosing between a couple of ideas that I decided to do multiple pranks. It all started on our first game vs the Stars in the season. I had disguised myself as one of the equipment managers and had gotten access to all the skates and sticks. When I got access, I changed the laces of the skates and the tape of the sticks to Buffalo Stampede colours. My next part was putting toothpaste in the inside of their skates. The final prank was spraying the locker room with poop smell spray. It smelled awful in the locker room. That night, I heard lots of fighting and screaming between the North Stars so I'd say that the pranks payed off.

ToeDragon84 · 10-01-2018, 02:07 PM

Jedi · 10-01-2018, 03:17 PM

A couple decades ago, there was a pretty heinous “prank” the Kelowna Knights played on the Vancouver Whalers. Story goes, yadda yadda, eventually they blew up the Vancouver mascot, and actual live whale. Pretty gnarly, right? I’m glossing over some details here and there but that’s not important. The important part was the blowing up and traumatizing of the Vancouver players and fanbase. Now, what I was tasked to do wasn’t as heinous. I mean, I’m not that messed up. I was asked to cause chaos in the Edmonton LR. Now, all this stuff I’ve said leading up to here makes you think one thing doesn’t it? That I stole their mascot, the live snow fox “Jackson”. Well, that’s where you’re wrong. You see, that wouldn’t actually be enough. So I stole Keygan instead. Yeap. He’s in my basement right now subsisting on white bread and butter. Pretty hilarious, right?

Alucard,Apr 14 2016, 03:33 PM Wrote:May the harvest be with you, young spud.

enigmatic,Aug 26 2016, 10:05 AM Wrote:Jedi could have 1 TPE and still improve any team

First ever Norwegian IIHF Goal!!

Code:
2. Team Norway , Jackson Rodgers-Tanaka 1 (Isabella Esparza-Osvaldson, Aleksander Andrezjeck) at 5:50

Special Thanks to Count Chocula for the Hugo G sig <3

***CaptainCrazy*** · 10-01-2018, 04:02 PM

Playoffs are with very large steps. One of the biggest Colorado Raptors' opponents is Vancouver Whalers.
We just found their home area locker room keys. We are planning to play against them in the SMJHL finals. Our plan is to get in and change colours to their uniforms. We want to paint them pink. Referees could notice it and maybe they will get disqualification from one of the home game and we will get a big advantage in the series.

Navigation

Extra Menu

About us