Trades Double Media

[Hello this is a x2 double trade media at 4050 words and it is ready to be graded.]

Hello everyone. I have finally gotten free time in my always busy schedule to do a piece of media that I have been putting off for a bloody god damn long time. The double media proc just made me realise it is about time I talked about it in more detail.

Now I am hoping the majority of people just ignore this media like most of mine cause it will just be my personal thoughts about the 2 Sim Hockey League trades I have been a part of and whilst technically this is only major league trades that count I will use my original Vancouver Whaler trade to Halifax Raiders as an example.

I take pretty big pride in having proved to everyone that when the Season 47 or Season 48 (I legit forget which draft class I am a part of. The weaker of the 2 draft classes I know that much) draft happened and I went nowhere near the first round that I deserved to be taken first round. Now nearly approaching my prime season I have proven I am one of and if not the actual best none defending player in the draft class at like 5th or 6th.

Truth being told I have not looked at Total Points Earned in seasons but I doubt the best of our draft class have fallen so I am just going to safely assume that is still accurate to this day and say that when I proved the doubters and silly General Managers wrong I will gunning to prove which side won in the trades I was a part of.

So let us begin with the very first one.

As Vancouver Whalers captain in a struggling season after dicking the league to win the 10th and final championship since the Jon Forty-One curse kicked in, the Vancouver Whalers decide to cash in on me leaving them to move up the following season to the Minnesota Chiefs.

If I had known I could have said no and it was not done like an hour after being alerted I would have naturally stopped this cause I had zero intent of being shipped to a team that we mocked throughout every season I was a part of, The Halifax Raiders. But this is hindsight and I was too new to sim leagues to know my player rights and all that jazz. Hell maybe stopping trades to a team you do not want to join is not even a thing in Sim Hockey League. I actually do not know or not, but anyway I continue on.

I was traded for a second overall in the Season 50 or Season 51 second round pick. So a fun fact about this too, I left the Vancouver Whalers locker room discord server until it was time for the draft. Just so I could scout or you know creepily scout and spy my replacement to see if it was worth the betrayal.

They ended up getting a center called Nicholas Corrigan or something roughly spelled like that for me from the trade. This gentlemen however would be a bust as he would be pretty inactive throughout his stay. Now he may be on the team still since I do not follow minor league of Sim Hockey League any more but I am fairly sure he did not do anything of note.

He was not active as me in the locker room, was never made captain or got close to it and I believe he did not make max stats at the minor league level.

So I know what you are thinking. Clearly this was a big dub (A double You. A W if you did not get that terrible comment. Look, I am trying to make this piece of media more exciting, I never said it was going to be amazing.) for the Halifax Raiders then, yeah?

Well, no not really.

See I will say the people of the Halifax Raiders team back then were amazing people to me throughout my stay there. I do not blame them for wanting to trade for me that season since I was one of the better Vancouver Whalers players and I could help them in the play-offs. But I just did not want to play for them.

I remember facing the Vancouver Whalers in like my 2nd or 3rd game and we won 5-1 against them with Jon Forty One being the best player of that game as a little 'Fuck you' game he did which felt really good. Like Anchorage, I am undefeated against them in my Mr Forty One career which is nice. But after that game I just lost all interest.

Sure, gunning the four star cup on a favourite to win it was neat but I just had zero motivation to do so and if we won it, neat we won it. If he did not win it, I would not care either. Well, the end of this story is a sad one since I think we got eliminated in the semi finals to Montreal (Yeah a team was called Montreal once upon a time. Shocking, luckily they moved to a better hockey location like Carolina!) or Anaheim I think and I have no idea who ended up winning it but we failed to win the championship is all I remember.

That was okay with me. Simon is and always was Simon and especially in the minors too. But after that I was just done with Minor league of Sim Hockey League. In hindsight I wish I stayed down and with them for one final season since that was the season you could use 425 Total Points Earned instead of 350 I believe which would have been great to dick the league with but that is just ifs and buts and I wanted to also gun Hall of Fame with Jon Forty One and I needed the stats in the major league of Sim Hockey League.

So honestly the trade for 1 future 2nd rounder for Jon Forty One had no winners. Literally none. At all. Vancouver Whalers lost. Halifax Raiders lost. The biggest loser of all, Jon Forty One, hardcore lost.

So yeah, that is my impression of the trade to give you an example of how this media will work from going forwards. I will also be doing an in character discussion to certain questions just to fluff this piece of media out on what he thinks. I must also say that Jon Forty One does like to whine, bitch and moan and its a gimmick so do not take it personally.

What did you think about the trade to Halifax Raiders?

"It was awful. They were fake friendly as hell. It was like they knew they needed me or something. But at least they wanted me I guess unlike those backstabbers in Vancouver. I was the most loyal and hardcore Whaler they had and I will always be in there record books now. Plus now that I put a curse of them, they will never get number 11 in the form of a 4 star cup until I am gone.

I cannot think of a better way for revenge on them than being stuck knowing I carried them to a fucking final trophy. Fuck Vancouver. Except Luke and Aaron Wilson, he is alright."

Do you miss playing in the minor league or in Vancouver?

"No. Now fuck off with your questions."


Okay, jesus Jon I was just asking you questions for an in character experience. Dude has issues. Anyway, so you should get the idea of how the following should go now for the main trade.

This following trade is why I am making this piece of media. It is the only Sim Hockey League trade that has included me in the major league and hopefully will be the only one in this career at least:

On the 11th of January in the year 2020. (Also side note: This feels a lot sooner than 9 months ago. It feels weird to be saying it is that long ago honestly.) This trade happened:

Here

For the lazy or people who cannot see it on the black layout cause of Buffaloes shitty colour gimmick changing links to be hard to see, here is what was traded:

"The Edmonton Blizzard receive:

Jon Forty-One

The Minnesota Chiefs receive:

Marc Hagan
S53 EDM 2nd
S54 EDM 2nd"

So just a standard couple of lower picks in the draft since Edmonton are usually a competitive and favoured team and some guy I cannot say I have personally ever heard of for yours truly, the cultist player Jon Forty One.

A lot of time has been passed now and we can see how Minnesota got for me. Now I will not say much past the reason I left being I did not see the future of Minnesota looking like a bright one and I hate to tell you so but I god damn told you all so. However the future is 100% brighter now that they are the Monarchs and I think this rebrand and fresh start is what they needed to get out of this long, long slump they have been in. I am actually hoping before I looked this up and write this that they have drafted two good players for me so it is not just me saying "Well, fuck they did not get shit for me and I am hitting 20 passing and 1700 Total Points Earned this week" but we will see. In an ideal world they got 2 more loyal and patient Jon Forty Ones for them.

So first of all let us look at my player.

I did have a pretty good tenure for my low Total Points Earned in Minnesota I would say. Nothing elite or competitive for awards but I was expected to do a lot worse and now that I am at Edmonton I have been able to either add depth or be a 1st line threat for the team. The following season I will have more Total Points Earned than well known Edmonton Sexy Player player Tony Pepperoni and Jon is roughly built the same way as him as a center.

I am now in the record books with the Edmonton Blizzard for 5th highest ever recorded Plus / Minus with + 39. Which I think is pretty good considering I was at about 1500 Total Points Earned at the time of that season starting. That was achieved on the way to winning the regular season cup (I do not remember what it is called but the Presidents Trophy equivalent in National Hockey League.) and had great stats for my Total Points Earned throughout my career so far and am not far off hitting my peak which is lovely.

I do plan of just checking free agency out once my long contract is finished (I legit do not know when it finishes) BUT will most likely stay at Edmonton since they have been so good to me. After some bullshit with long contracts in other sim leagues I no longer will sign stupidly long contracts cause some General Managers are dicks but I plan on resigning for the most part. Mainly just for the ego boost and to see where I could potentially go if I wanted to leave.

So this may be biased but I think I am doing very well and this was a great trade overall. I am also a pretty good player for Team Great Britain too considering we are farming medals for fun these days. In another lifetime the Manhattan Rage would have picked me up instead and I could have helped them out and maybe been a big player for them but I am confident I would have done well or consistent enough with low Total Points Earned when I was low to help them out as well.

So Edmonton Blizzard got a pretty good 1st liner center from this trade that is just about to hit its peak.

Now, we can move onto the Minnesota Chiefs' stuff and beginning with the Marc Hagan guy. Truth being told, I was really struggling to find him. I checked the Minnesota Monarch's roster page and he is gone now so that did not help. I am semi hoping he was not traded cause I just have no idea on how I would find that out and then it would add another layer to this trade.

Okay, I am writing this as I find him out and I just found out that it is Campin Killer's player who got to 743 Total Points Earned before seemingly retiring. So he was a decent player who just basically retired and recreated. That explains why I did not know this player.

Coincidentally, he was the 23rd overall pick for the Edmonton Blizzard in Season 47 which is funny cause I was the 23rd pick for the Minnesota Chiefs the following season so it was like a mini 23rd overall trade. Also remember than getting Jay Peepee Bolvin 23rd the following season after that which is funny that Edmonton Blizzard have a weird connection around this time to 23rd overall. Well, I thought it was cool.

I assume he played a little bit for the Minnesota Chiefs before retiring soon after or he just went inactive for a little bit and is back now. If so, welcome back good sir. Overall though he did not earn that much for Minnesota and did not get over 1000 Total Points Earned which is a shame so this leans the trade towards the Edmonton Blizzard for now, BUT! A really big but too...We will now see what they got in the drafts!

I will start with the easier of these picks. Which is the Season 54 pick rather than the first season 53 draft pick cause that gets a little confusing and complicated it seems. But this draft pick ended up being the 2nd to last 2nd rounder at 31st.

The Minnesota Chiefs drafted: Slimy Snail!

This is a little weird to see because I know Flesh Bag Soup. He is my bae-gel. We were once Tijuana Luchadores alumini back when they were a cool team that did not betray loyal players, former Colorado Yeti team mates and we are currently on the best Super Casual Football Sim League team in the league, the New Zealand Wallabies.

I cannot stress how much of a steal this pick is going to be and I am a little shocked to see someone this good at sim leagues drop this fucking far in a draft honestly. I guess General Managers still lack the ability to draft well in Sim Hockey League. This is a future super star in defending in this league 100%

Now whilst he has not moved up yet from the minor leagues and I have no clue where he is playing right now. He has a whopping 567 Total Points Earned so far for his player for when he moves up. I really like that they got someone this fucking good that low down. This is easily the Jon Forty-One replacement for me and will be a really good player for the Czech Republic purely cause no french team exists to eat and devour him whole. Just has to watch out for the french canadians I guess.

Sure this will take a while for him to be on par with the rest of the league in Total Points Earned rather than an immediate threat but that was always the case for a trade of draft picks. I am very easily going to be able to say that the Minnesota Chiefs benefitted greatly for my trade now and I still have another draft pick to look up. That is a great god damn player they will have for the future and I am glad to see they have him.

Okay, it is time for the way more complicated draft pick.

The Season 53 2nd rounded. This pick ended up becoming the 26th overall pick for the league. Now I will just announce first that Minnesota Chiefs ended up trading this pick away to West Kendall Platoon who ended up picking up a player known as Ziggy Tambo. Someone I also have never heard of. To this day he seems like he is still with the Anaheim Outlaws team and stuck at 324 Total Points Earned and is completely inactive. My first clue was the fact that he has not been on the forum since february but I could be completely wrong and he is somehow active past not posting or logging in! Doubtful though.

Basically this turned into a dead and bust pick. So I would like to say sorry to the Platoon in particular because I seem to have a history of fucking you guys over.

In 2014 I was a player called Isaac Mute and you traded to get me and I was already inactive at that point so that trade really did not help you whatsoever in 2014 and it seems this one also hurt you, so it would seem I am always involved in hurting you indirectly and I am sorry for that. You did pass up on drafting me though so I guess we can call it even.

Ziggo Tamba since then was traded to Tampa Bay Barracudas as part of a big trade for some bloke I have once again never heard of. They most likely knew he was inactive and offloaded contract space I imagine if anything considering by then it would have been 2 solid months since he had done anything. That particular trade has nothing really connected to this one past he was the person taken by the original Edmonton Blizzard pick and since Tampa Bay are getting either a Season 55 or Season 56 Platoon 1st a long with a Season 58 Platoon 2nd it is up to someone else to see if those picks for this Valentin Kalashinikov guy was worth it like the Jon Forty One trade is cause the player included in both of these 100% was not good or a surprise pick up of an elite player.

With all of this said though, it is now time to see what Minnesota got for trading the Season 53 Edmonton Blizzard 2nd round pick from the West Kendall Platoon

For the Season 53 Edmonton Blizzard 2nd round pick that was traded to West Kendall Platoon! They got:

No clue lol.

No legit I cannot find the trade that was included with this I tried searching on the forums and looked at a few Minnesota based trades but I either missed it or just did not find that particular trade so I kind of messed up this media since I am missing what the fuck they ended up getting for it. I imagine this would now need a part 2 to this media if anyone can help me out cause I cannot find where it was traded. I am sorry :(

I am however ready to make a judgement regardless of who won this trade cause I think it is fairly obvious.

The winner of this trade is:

Both teams (The Edmonton Blizzard and The Minnesota Chiefs, now Monarchs.)

The player did not add much for Minnesota and could have just been taken to remove the contract from Edmonton Blizzard's cap space anyway for all I know. But both teams got a huge fucking player. The Edmonton Blizzard got the current first line center who is around 1 point per game for them and the Minnesota Monarchs got a really elite player for the future as well in the form of a defender. It is win-win really and I am really glad I have that ability to say that. The future is a lot brighter for Minnesota Monarch's for me now that I know they have Meat Wad on their team.

I was lowkey worried at the start of writing that this may turn into me looking like I am being a dick to Minensota but they have a player that will dick the league in team so all is bloody well! I would say the biggest loser of this trade right now is the West Kendall Platoon but I need to find this missing trade to see what it actually had so I can put all the pieces together. For all I know Minnesota Monarchs ended up getting something great from that trade too to really make trading me worth it for the future.

I doubt they would ever want me again but wouldn't it be fucking hilarious if I eventually rejoined the Minnesota team? I indirectly helped them get a lot of talent for the far future and then they get me for depth then. Some 300 IQ moves if that was planned like. It was not at all and I do not think they would like me but its fun to state at least.

I really need another part to this now for that final part if anyone is willing to show me it. Or I am happy to see what other people think about this trade considering I think it is fair to say both teams got what they wanted from it and potentially more.

But for now I am going to do Jon Forty Ones thought on the overall trade:

What do you think about your trade to the Edmonton Blizzard?

I can say without a shadow of a doubt I did not care one way or the other. Both are cold as fuck places and both have annoying people in it. Well, to be fair to them both I think every team seemingly has annoying people in it but that still counts, I hate them both.

Do you actually like anything or any teams in particular?

The Nevada Battle Born, The Quebec City Citadelles, The Seattle Argonauts and The Atalanta Inferno. So basically the teams that have not and could not ever screw me. Maybe Regina Force or whoever they are now, Detroit Falcons and West Kendall or wherever the fuck they are from now Platoon. At a push. The rest suck.

Who do you think won this draft that involved you in?

Me personally I think and that is all I care about. I do not think either team was ever going to give me captain but I do not care about that. I probably would just get traded if I was the captain anyway again. I am doing very well for the Edmonton Blizzard and as of right now I have 19 assists and 1 goals in 31 games. That is my focus and will continue to be my focus. This is just so I can have more money so be it but these bollocks interviews mean very little to me at all.

Why are you still such a salty dick?

Cause the whole Sim Hockey League are dicks. Karma is a bitch, bitch. Now get used to me and Team Great Britain farming every coloured medals every season too.

What do you think of Slimy Snail and his future since your trade affected where he ended up?

I think it is brave someone so slow and lacking a spine ended up on a team but he will do as well as the other spineless players of the league honestly. It sucks he is a part of Czechia and not someone good like Canada but what can you do. You cannot chosen where you are born, right? As for his future, I can safely and very confidently say without any doubts in my mind that his career will 100% not or never matter to me. So I do not care.


Okay so I think this is a good spot to stop the possible first part of this media. I hope you all enjoyed it if you did read it and look forward to the possible second part (Please show me the other trade I missed please :( )

Until then it is good bye from me.

Proud S67 - S69 Colorado Raptors Captain 
S57 Forward of the Season Award winner 

Now I am free <3

I think in the end the MIN/EDM trade benefitted both teams as well as it could have for the situation.

As for the trade between WKP and MIN for the EDM 2nd  I have it here: https://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=104256
Unfortunately it leads down another trade rabbit hole haha.

But in short that trade ends with MIN drafting Ben Van Dijk(Currently in his rookie year for MIN) in S53, Grapefruit Lizard(Prospect that seems to have gone IA by now) in S54, and the final pick was traded to Seattle in a deal recently to get defender Akashi SixNine(1100 S47 Defenseman).