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ThisSeemsFishy · 04-23-2024, 08:53 PM

Static crosses televisions across the world as TURG TURG once again hacks the broadcast (how is he doing this?). TURG stands in his dimly lit basement as he gestures to the camera.

HELLO FRIENDS AND ENEMIES! IT IS ME, TURG TURG! I AM BACK WITH A FOLLOW UP TO THE LAST TIME WE SPOKE HA HA. TODAY WE ARE LOOKING AT THE TOP TEN ROOKIES IN THE RUNNING FOR THE ESA ANRIKKANEN (WOW THAT WAS HARD TO SAY) FOR ROOKIE OF THE YEAR IN SIMULATION HOCKEY LEAGUE! TURG WILL ALSO MAKE PREDICTION ON WHO WILL WIN IT ALL! STRAP ON AND LET US GET TO IT!

SO AS WE ALL KNOW, IT IS USUALLY THE ROOKIE WITH A GOOD POINT TOTAL WHO WINS ROOKIE OF THE YEAR! WHEN TURG WAS ROOKIE, HE WAS BAD AT GET POINTS! BUT THESE 10 ROOKIES ARE GOOD AT GET POINTS! LET US SEE WHO THEY ARE!

Rookie Points Leaders

1. Sad Ketchup syndicate

44 Points

2. Betzee Nickelback Rage

39 Points

3. Shawn Pawn Barracuda

36 Points

T4. Rence Sykut Argonauts

34 Points

T4. Ryland Murphy Dragons

34 Points

T6. Kenny Omega Wolfpack

33 Points

T6. Mac Turner Stars

33 Points

T6. Ubba Lodbrok Forge

33 Points

9. Marek Carda Forge

32 Points

10. Jussi Mutou Patriotes

31 Points

IT LOOKS LIKE THE TOP 2 IN POINTS IS PRETTY MUCH RIGHT WHERE TURG EXPECTED WITH SAD KETCHUP AND BETZEE NICKELBACK LEADING THE WAY!! TURG WILL SHOW EVERYONE HIS PREVIOUS TOP 5 PREDICTION AND THEN TALK ABOUT IT OKAY?

TURG’s LIST OF POSSIBLE ROOKIE OF THE YEARS
1. Sad Ketchup
2. Betzee Nickelback
3. Cal Juice
4. Kristian Seppanen
5. Jussi Mutou

SO GOING OFF POINTS ALONE, SAD KETCHUP AND BETZEE NICKELBACK MAKE SENSE. JUSSI MUTOU IS DOWN IN 10TH AND COULD IMPROVE, BUT TURG LIKELY MOVE HIM OUT OF TOP 5 IN NEXT RANKING. TURG ALSO LIKELY MOVE CAL JUICE AND KRISTIAN SEPPANEN OUT OF TOP 5 BUT THAT IS FOR DIFFERENT REASON! CAL JUICE IS A WHOLE YEAR YOUNGER THAN MOST OTHER ROOKIES, AND KRISTIAN SEPPANEN IS A DEFENCE MAN! SO IT IS OKAY IF THEY DON’T GET AS MANY POINTS!

LET US LOOK AT TOP GOAL SCORERS NEXT AS TURG BELIEVES THAT AWARDS VOTERS LOOK AT THIS AS WELL SOMETIMES!

Rookie Goals Leaders

1. Sad Ketchup syndicate

20 Goals (Points Rank: 1st)

2. Jussi Mutou Patriotes

17 Goals (Points Rank: 10th)

3. Ryland Murphy Dragons

14 Goals (Points Rank: T4th)

T4. Lily Jin Morrow Wolfpack

13 Goals (Points Rank: 11th)

T4. Florian Soderberg-Motyla Stars

13 Goals (Points Rank: 18th)

T4. Jerry Moonshine Dragons

13 Goals (Points Rank: 13th)

T7. Vyacheslav Shevchenko Blizzard

12 Goals (Points Rank: 21st)

T7. Shawn Pawn Barracuda

12 Goals (Points Rank: 3rd)

T7. Mac Turner Stars

12 Goals (Points Rank: T6th)

T7. Prince Marius Stampede

12 Goals (Points Rank: 14th)

LOOKING AT BOTH LISTS SHOWS THAT THERE ARE 4 PLAYERS IN BOTH TOP 10 IN POINTS AND GOALS! THOSE PLAYERS ARE SAD KETCHUP (1ST IN BOTH), RYLAND MURPHY (T4TH IN POINTS, 3RD IN GOALS), SHAWN PAWN (3RD IN POINTS, T7TH IN GOALS), and JUSSI MUTOU (10TH IN POINTS, 2ND IN GOALS).

NOW OBVIOUSLY THIS ISN’T THE MOST IMPORTANT THING WHEN IT COMES TO WHO IS THE BEST ROOKIE! LET US LOOK AT ASSIST LEADERS

Rookie Assist Leaders

1. Betzee Nickelback Rage

30 Assists (Points Rank: 2nd)

2. Rence Sykut Argonauts

25 Assists (Points Rank: 4th)

T3. Kenny Omega Wolfpack

24 Assists (Points Rank: T6th)

T3. Shawn Pawn Barracuda

24 Assists (Points Rank: 3rd)

T3. Sad Ketchup syndicate

24 Assists (Points Rank: 1st)

T6. Marek Carda Forge

23 Assists (Points Rank: 9th)

T6. Ubba Lodbrok Forge

23 Assists (Points Rank: T6th)

8th. Mac Turner Stars

21 Assists (Points Rank: T6th)

T9th. Ryland Murphy Dragons

20 Assists (Points Rank: T4th)

T9th. bongo Inferno

20 Assists (Points Rank: T15th)

THERE ARE QUITE A FEW NAMES THAT SEEM TO POP UP OVER AND OVER AGAIN! THOSE PLAYERS ARE VERY GOOD!

TURG WOULD ALSO LIKE TO GIVE DEFENSIVE ROOKIES THEIR FLOWERS AS THEY TEND TO GET LEFT BEHIND IF THEY DO NOT GET LOTS OF POINTS!

Rookie Shots Blocked Leaders

1. Kristian Seppanen Inferno

108 Blocks

2. Mikkel Enevoldsen Patriotes

95 Blocks

3. Jonas Salat Panthers

93 Blocks

4. Brooklyn Physt Stars

84 Blocks

5. Unspeakable Horror Barracuda

83 Blocks

6. Jeff Goldblum Wolfpack

80 Blocks

7. Guy Incognito Renegades

79 Blocks

8. Wes Thunderbass syndicate

65 Blocks

9. Valerija Serapin Patriotes

63 Blocks

10. Dunkler Sowerwine Barracuda

57 Blocks

LOTS OF GOOD DEFENSIVE PLAY!

NOW IT IS FINALLY TIME FOR TURG’S ROOKIE OF THE YEAR PREDICTION PART 2. SINCE THERE IS SO MUCH MORE OF THE SEASON TO GO AND THE PLAYERS ARE SO CLOSELY RANKED, TURG WILL DOUBLE THE LIST FROM 5 TO 10!! YOWIE WOWIE THAT IS A LOT OF ROOKIES!

TURG TURG’S ROOKIE OF THE YEAR RANKING NUMBER 2: THE SECOND ONE

1. Sad Ketchup syndicate

(previous rank: 1) (G: 1st, A: T3rd, P: 1st)

2. Shawn Pawn Barracuda

(previous rank: NR) (G: T7, A: T3rd, P: 3rd)

3. Ryland Murphy Dragons

(previous rank: NR) (G: 3rd, A: T9th, P: T4th)

4. Betzee Nickelback Rage

(previous rank: 2) (G: T15th, A: 1st, P: 2nd)

5. Mac Turner Stars

(previous rank: NR) (G: T7th, A: 8th, P: T6th)

6. Rence Sykut Argonauts

(previous rank: NR) (G: T15th, A: 2nd, P: T4th)

7. Jussi Mutou Patriotes

(previous rank: 5) (G: 2nd), A: T21st, P: 10th)

8. Ubba Lodbrok Forge

(previous rank: NR) (G: T13th, A: T6th, P: T6th)

9. Lily Jin Morrow Wolfpack

(previous rank: NR) (G: 4th, A: T13th, P: T11th)

10. Kenny Omega Wolfpack

(previous rank: NR) (G: T15th, A: T3rd, P: T6th)

HM. Marek Carda Forge

(G: T15th, A: T6th, P: 9th)

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT FRIENDS! TURG’S RANKING OF ROOKIES OF THE YEAR! WILL SAD KETCHUP HAVE A REASON TO BE HAPPY, OR WILL ONE OF THE OTHER MANY ROOKIES WIPE HIM UP? TURG DOES NOT KNOW!!