The title says it all. Ask me questions and I'll answer at the latest when I return from the bar tonight. Aside from that, yadda yadda yadda, Chiefs winger Michael Gerrard had a career season with 32 points but he still sucks majorly on the ice rink so that's not really a topic I can elaborate on nicely. His 11 goals and 21 assists were career highs likewise, the same applies for his ice time of a tad more than 20 minutes per evening. Other feats include 64 hits thrown, a +/- of +12 and 9 shots blocked. His increased ice time had a lot to do with the Chiefs falling to a first round exit yet again, this time around losing to the Toronto North Stars. For the third or fourth time in a row now, Minnesota has not been able to get past the first playoff round.
Fire off dem questions.

Originally posted by iOBESE+Nov 20 2016, 04:20 PM--><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1' id='QUOTE-WRAP'><tr><td>QUOTE (iOBESE @ Nov 20 2016, 04:20 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->How can you be broke?[/b]

I've never had a league job in my entire time here (and most likely never will) and my last article probably stems from my rookie season in Minnesota, which had been season 26 or season 27. And my bank account says I'm in the red numbers again even though -$700k is the same number it had prior to the start of the season. So yeah, that all leads up to me not having a single penny in the bank. Blame it on Gerrard's alcohol problems.
And a big up for a Porzingis GIF as your avatar, that's straight money in the bank.

Originally posted by SabresFan@Nov 20 2016, 04:54 PM<br />I can't be entirely sure how it happened, but I'd hazard a guess that he spent more money than he made for a period of time.

Yes and no. I stopped paying for training last offseason because I had been $700k minus, but the number is the same right now and seeing how I only spend $500k on training every week and got a $6M contract for this season, I'm not entirely sure how I'm broke again. I mean, I know I'm not rich but I had hoped to have at least a million or two remaining in Fort Knox.

Originally posted by Bojo@Nov 20 2016, 05:01 PM<br />You should probably stop fucking until you fix yourself

That, my dear Bojo, is actually a valid argument but the lack of Pushkin pictures in your post knda nuls your point. My general of thumb is not too take your post far too seriously if I don't see a photo of your furry lover and significant other, or two bad puns. Otherwise I didn't fuck around until I got broke, but instead got fucked by STHS (and my lack of hockey knowledge) and am broke now. Does that make sense at all? Maybe. Maybe not.

Originally posted by mpc@Nov 20 2016, 05:09 PM<br />How many times does <a href='index.php?showuser=1546' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Slappydoodle</a> look at the PorzinGod gif before going about his regular business?

I don't know if <a href='index.php?showuser=1546' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Slappydoodle</a> is a fellow New York Knicks fan, but if he is indeed then I salute him as a comrade in misery. Those Knicks fans who have been for longer than the Carmelo know precisely what I'm talking about, the dark times of the 00's. At least there's a silver lining now with the Latvian. He gets some bonus points if he can name the situation my avatar stems from.

Originally posted by Slappydoodle@Nov 20 2016, 05:40 PM<br />I am an old man. I have been watching the Knicks regularly since the late eighties. Patrick Ewing is my favorite basketball player of all time,  but current fave is the great PorzingGod no doubt. I realize none of that was a question but oh well. 

Would you like to have my babies or rather have my babies named after you?
Big up to you sir, even though I have to say that we probably haven't talked to each other so far - which is a shame, because us Knicks fans have to stand together. :lol: Hope you're that Knicks v Hawks matchup right now in that case.

Originally posted by SabresFan@Nov 20 2016, 05:56 PM<br />So it could be a bank error perhaps. I was responding more to the other guy's snarky remark.  Anyway, I hope you can find something to write about in the mean time while any error gets corrected.

Oh, I'm not blaming it on the bank at all. Sorry if that came across the wrong way, blame it on my English abilities. It would be nice if it would be a bank error but truth be told, it's most likely rather me spending all $6M I had this year already.

Originally posted by Chris-McZehrl@Nov 20 2016, 06:32 PM<br />Kann ich dir irgendwie helfen? :o

Oh, you can help me indeed. As of right now, I'm about as hungry in real life as I am broke here on this site so if you would or could order me pizza with some toppings and extra cheese, that'd be super sweet. Other than that, I need some serious help on how to fix my build if I want to be a serviceable player here at some point because I feel like I fucked up my build somewhere along the way pretty early. Probably in the SMJHL already. ) Other than that, if all other things fail why don't you send me some of that money of yours my way?

Originally posted by Chris-McZehrl@Nov 20 2016, 07:24 PM<br />i have here now money :lol:

for option one .... hmmm tapas?

option two .... your build is fucked up? why the hell? DAMMIT

Well I for my own don't have any money left on this site but I figure I'll find a way to get on by. :lol:

Well tapas is a very good idea, but in the end I went with a nice lahmacun... yummy!

Well if I had any idea or answer, I would have solved it but right now I think it's too late to get things across. I've become accostumed to being a depth player and as long as it helps the team win games I'm fine with that.

Originally posted by Samee@Nov 20 2016, 07:36 PM<br />how much money r u looking to make off this presser?

tangerines or oranges?

To be honest, I don't know. I'm pretty hammered right now as I'm typing this and the Porzingis gif I have set as my avatar is totally confusing and draws me away frpm writing but I guess I will try to finish this up in the morning. As long as it's worth more than $500k, then it's ok for me.

Oranges in summer, tangerines in winter! Perfect supply of vitamin C at all times of the year, very healthy for anyone. :lol:

Originally posted by princekyle@Nov 20 2016, 07:40 PM<br />If we give you money, how do we know Gerrard won't just spend it on more alcohol?

That is a very good point and I have to admit I am totally fucking hammered as I'm typing this so I finish this dutch and then I'll go to sleep- Gerrard will probably drink away his contract money first and then his pain like Mobb Deep, so you aren't that far off from the truth with that assumption. You either drink responsibly or constantly, and Gerrard certainly does the latter of the two.

Originally posted by wikiplaysgames@Nov 20 2016, 09:08 PM<br />
OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU'RE BACK

Yeah I'm back, back from the underground, back for more.

Originally posted by wikiplaysgames@Nov 20 2016, 10:43 PM<br />
Unfortunately the general consensus is this league sucks ass because newer generation users are cucks but pm me sometime bro

Oh captain, my captain. Go ahead and update your player you little fuck.

<!--QuoteBegin-GoodLeftUndone@Nov 21 2016, 04:17 AM
Why have we never been teammates here?

Top 5 favorite beer brands[/quote]
There's two possible answers to this question. One is, you haven't signed with Minnesota yet because I've never been on any other team in this league besides Montreal in the juniors. In case you haven't ever been here, you should totally do it so we can break that first round curse why is haunting this franchise now for quite a bit, or rather ever since I've been here. Maybe the management should just tell me to fuck off. The other option is me leaving Minnesota, but the chances of that are slim to none as well because they keep me chained in the basement only to let me out for gamedays. I've gotten used to it, at least the pasta they're serving me is quite delicious.

In no particular order: Früh Kölsch, Franziskaner Hefeweizen, Bitburger Pils, Dreher Pils, Peters Kölsch.

____________________________________________________________________________________


Since this presser is closed I guess, here's a couple of things that won't hurt to say and are long overdue to be said: Apologies to first and foremost <a href='index.php?showuser=1765' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>Eggy216</a>, to <a href='index.php?showuser=1269' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-34'>Tanner</a> of course, and lastly to <a href='index.php?showuser=560' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-13'>701 aka YUNG GUAP GOD</a>. I've said dumb things, derogatory things and went out of my way to use terms that were unwarranted (for the lack of better words, I hope the point gets across). I don't expect you to accept or believe that apology, that wouldn't be a surprise, but wanted to get this straight. We may not agree on most things, but that didn't give me the right to utter stupid shit towards people in every direction I could.

How can you be broke?

Danila "DAN" Zhernov #9 || D || Kelowna Knights || 419 TPE
Name: Danila Zhernov
Nationality: Ukrainian
Age: 18
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 220 lbs
Number: 9
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Regular Season Stats
S50 (KEL) : GP: 50, G: 3, A: 10, P: 13, +/-: -4, PIMS: 22, H: 40, SB: 52
S51 (KEL) : GP: 50, G: 4, A: 29, P: 33, +/-: +3, PIMS: 52, H: 84, SB: 61
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Stats
S50 (KEL) : GP: 6, G: 0, A: 1, P: 1, +/-: -2, PIMS: 4, H: 6, SB: 7[/pbl]
S50 (KEL) : GP: 20, G: 2, A: 9, P: 11, +/-: 0, PIMS: 22, H: 33, SB: 30[/pbl]
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Career History
S49 WJC Bronze Medalist with Team World
S50 SMJHL Entry draft - Round 3 - Overall 24th pick by Kelowna Knights
S50 Regular season ranked 9th with Kelowna Knights
S51 SHL Draft - Round 3 - Overall 23rd pick by Edmonton Blizzard
S51 Joined Team Switzerland of IIHF
S51 IIHF silver medalist with Team Switzerland
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bank Account: unknown


- Player Page - Update Page -

Hans Zucker #81 || RW || Montreal Militia || Retired (S45 - S49)
Name: Hans Zucker
Nationality: Belgian
Age: 22
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 215 lbs
Number: 81
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Regular Season Stats
S45 (MTL) : GP: 50, G: 4, A: 5, P: 9, +/-: -14, PIMS: 16, H: 41, SB: 7
S46 (MTL) : GP: 50, G: 9, A: 9, P: 18, +/-: +11, PIMS: 2, H: 15, SB: 3
S47 (MTL) : GP: 50, G: 8, A: 7, P: 15, +/-: +7, PIMS: 10, H: 22, SB: 1
S48 (MTL) : GP: 50, G: 6, A: 3, P: 9, +/-: +1, PIMS: 10, H: 21, SB: 3
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Stats
S45 (MTL) : GP: 6, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: +1, PIMS: 0, H: 2, SB: 1
S46 (MTL) : GP: 12, G: 1, A: 2, P: 3, +/-: -6, PIMS: 4, H: 18, SB: 1
S47 (MTL) : GP: 19, G: 4, A: 1, P: 5, +/-: +6, PIMS: 0, H: 13, SB: 2
S48 (MTL) : GP: 7, G: 0, A: 0, P: 0, +/-: -2, PIMS: 4, H: 2, SB: 1
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Career History
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bank Account: unknown

Teodors Cukurs #14 || C || Edmonton Blizzard || Retired (S31 - S45)
Name: Teodors Cukurs
Nationality: Latvian
Age: 26
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 230 lbs
Number: 14
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Regular Season Stats
S31 (PGF) : GP: 50, G: 10, A: 21, P: 31, +/-: -6, PIMS: 33, H: 47, SB: 9, FO%: 53.71%
S32 (PGF) : GP: 50, G: 9, A: 22, P: 31, +/-: 0, PIMS: 23, H: 49, SB: 9, FO%: 57.41%
S33 (PGF) : GP: 50, G: 17, A: 25, P: 32, +/-: +8, PIMS: 30, H: 72, SB: 12, FO%: 53.29%
S34 (SEA) : GP: 50, G: 8, A: 10, P: 18, +/-: +3, PIMS: 11, H: 30, SB: 3, FO%: 51.30%
S35 (SEA) : GP: 50, G: 8, A: 10, P: 18, +/-: -11, PIMS: 19, H: 39, SB: 5, FO%: 50.30%
S36 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 12, A: 19, P: 31, +/-: -21, PIMS: 20, H: 27, SB: 10, FO%: 50.99%
S37 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 19, A: 27, P: 46, +/-: -11, PIMS: 17, H: 72, SB: 11, FO%: 52.08%
S38 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 17, A: 29, P: 46, +/-: -14, PIMS: 18, H: 44, SB: 19, FO%: 55.26%
S39 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 16, A: 22, P: 38, +/-: -3, PIMS: 13, H: 32, SB: 18, FO%: 52.80%
S40 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 14, A: 20, P: 34, +/-: +15, PIMS: 32, H: 35, SB: 9, FO%: 53.24%
S41 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 15, A: 34, P: 49, +/-: -2, PIMS: 36, H: 78, SB: 14, FO%: 55.03%
S42 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 17, A: 28, P: 45, +/-: 6, PIMS: 22, H: 80, SB: 12, FO%: 55.15%
S43 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 17, A: 23, P: 40, +/-: 0, PIMS: 22, H: 100, SB: 10, FO%: 57.94%
S44 (EDM) : GP: 50, G: 14, A: 27, P: 41, +/-: 21, PIMS: 20, H: 87, SB: 11, FO%: 55.61%
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Playoff Stats
S31 (PGF) : GP: 4, G: 1, A: 1, P: 2, +/-: -4, PIMS: 2, H: 5, SB: 0, FO%: 58.88%
S32 (PGF) : GP: 11, G: 5, A: 7, P: 12, +/-: +5, PIMS: 8, H: 12, SB: 2, FO%: 56.07%
S33 (PGF) : GP: 7, G: 0, A: 8, P: 8, +/-: +4, PIMS: 4, H: 5, SB: 2, FO%: 62.19%
S39 (EDM) : GP: 7, G: 0, A: 7, P: 7, +/-: +0, PIMS: 0, H: 5, SB: 2, FO%: 50.00%
S40 (EDM) : GP: 7, G: 3, A: 4, P: 7, +/-: -2, PIMS: 2, H: 9, SB: 12, FO%: 58.46%
S41 (EDM) : GP: 7, G: 0, A: 3, P: 3, +/-: +1, PIMS: 6, H: 15, SB: 2, FO%: 51.69%
S42 (EDM) : GP: 11, G: 4, A: 7, P: 11, +/-: +1, PIMS: 6, H: 22, SB: 2, FO%: 51.41%
S44 (EDM) : GP: 11, G: 1, A: 7, P: 8, +/-: +3, PIMS: 4, H: 8, SB: 3, FO%: 54.10%
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Career History
S31: 2nd overall pick in S31 SMJHL draft by Prince George Firebirds
S31: #1 Rookie by points (31 points) in SMJHL
S32: 4th overall pick in S32 SHL draft by Portland Admirals
S32: #1 Center by FO% won (57.41%) in SMJHL
S32: Voted to be a GM of a Fantasy Series Team
S32: Won the Fantasy Series with Kursk Anthon's Russian Dumplings
S34: Traded from Portland Admirals to Seattle Riot
S36: Traded from Seattle Riot to Edmonton Blizzard
S37: Received Aidan Richan Trophy
S40: #1 Center by FO% won (58.46%) in SHL Playoffs
S45: Retired
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bank Account: unknown

I can't be entirely sure how it happened, but I'd hazard a guess that he spent more money than he made for a period of time.

 
Player Render by Merica

You should probably stop fucking until you fix yourself

How many times does <a href='index.php?showuser=1546' rel='nofollow' alt='profile link' class='user-tagged mgroup-3'>Slappydoodle</a> look at the PorzinGod gif before going about his regular business?

I am an old man. I have been watching the Knicks regularly since the late eighties. Patrick Ewing is my favorite basketball player of all time, but current fave is the great PorzingGod no doubt. I realize none of that was a question but oh well.

So it could be a bank error perhaps. I was responding more to the other guy's snarky remark. Anyway, I hope you can find something to write about in the mean time while any error gets corrected.

 
Player Render by Merica

Kann ich dir irgendwie helfen? :o

Challenge Cup Wins:
S18 - Seattle Riot (with Chris McZehrl)*
S23 - New England Wolfpack (with Chris McZehrl)*
S27 - Calgary Dragons (with VLAD McZehrl)
S34 - Manhattan Rage (with VLAD McZehrl)
S37 - Winnipeg Jets (with VLAD McZehrl)
S46 - Buffalo Stampede (with GOD McZehrl)*

*first ever Challenge Cup of Franchise History

Four Star Cup Wins:
S24 - Vancouver Whalers (with VLAD McZehrl)
S39 - St. Louis Scarecrows (with GOD McZehrl)

SHL Hall of Fame Members:
S24 - Chris McZehrl *
(GP: 764 | G: 322 | A: 461 | P: 783 | +/-: +109)
S40 - VLAD McZehrl *
(GP: 653 | G: 333 | A: 361 | P: 694 | +/-: +141)

*1st Ballot Hall of Famer

small note: GOD McZehrl played at first as Defender and later as Forward!

i have here now money :lol:

for option one .... hmmm tapas?

option two .... your build is fucked up? why the hell? DAMMIT

Challenge Cup Wins:
S18 - Seattle Riot (with Chris McZehrl)*
S23 - New England Wolfpack (with Chris McZehrl)*
S27 - Calgary Dragons (with VLAD McZehrl)
S34 - Manhattan Rage (with VLAD McZehrl)
S37 - Winnipeg Jets (with VLAD McZehrl)
S46 - Buffalo Stampede (with GOD McZehrl)*

*first ever Challenge Cup of Franchise History

Four Star Cup Wins:
S24 - Vancouver Whalers (with VLAD McZehrl)
S39 - St. Louis Scarecrows (with GOD McZehrl)

SHL Hall of Fame Members:
S24 - Chris McZehrl *
(GP: 764 | G: 322 | A: 461 | P: 783 | +/-: +109)
S40 - VLAD McZehrl *
(GP: 653 | G: 333 | A: 361 | P: 694 | +/-: +141)

*1st Ballot Hall of Famer

small note: GOD McZehrl played at first as Defender and later as Forward!

how much money r u looking to make off this presser?

tangerines or oranges?

https://simulationhockey.com/showthread.php?tid=130731

If we give you money, how do we know Gerrard won't just spend it on more alcohol?

Originally posted by princekyle@Nov 20 2016, 12:40 PM
If we give you money, how do we know Gerrard won't just spend it on more alcohol?

OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU'RE BACK

Originally posted by wikiplaysgames@Nov 20 2016, 01:08 PM



OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU'RE BACK

Yeah it took a while, but I've got enough stability in my life now that I can focus on other things like SHL. So I should be back for good.

Originally posted by princekyle@Nov 20 2016, 02:13 PM


Yeah it took a while, but I've got enough stability in my life now that I can focus on other things like SHL. So I should be back for good.

Unfortunately the general consensus is this league sucks ass because newer generation users are cucks but pm me sometime bro

Originally posted by wikiplaysgames@Nov 20 2016, 02:43 PM

Unfortunately the general consensus is this league sucks ass because newer generation users are cucks but pm me sometime bro

We're gonna make SHL great again