Quote:1. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
Reflection on your season - how did your player fare on the ice this season? Did you meet or surpass your individual player goals or did you come up short? Whether you excelled or disappointed - what can you attribute that to? What will you try to do better next season?

Season 54 has brought a resurgence to Augustus Wang’s style of play. From once a highly offensive threat in his junior years, Wang has evolved into a defensive powerhouse alongside his defensive partner, Alexander Selich. Wang’s decision to transition into a more defensively oriented style was his own decision as he was willing to defer the bulk of the offensive responsibilities to the rest of his teammates. I believe that Wang’s defensive play style this past season was integral in the Buffalo Stampede’s success. His play became a perfect fit for the Stampede as they posted the league’s lowest goals against over the entire regular season. Wang and Selich proved to be solid defensively in the playoffs by posting the second lowest goals against per 60 in the Season 54 playoffs among players who made it past the second round. As Wang continues to grow into a larger role on the Stampede, we can only expect him to improve offensively as he gradually takes on more offensive responsibilities. Overall, we can expect Wang and the Stampede to come back with a vengeance next season as they look to replicate their President’s Trophy performance from this past season.

(197 Words)

3/16

Quote:2. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
Well, dang. Your team didn't make the finals this season - my condolences to you. Are you and your teammates planning on watching the finals even though you're not in it? If so, what are your watch parties like? If not, are you still following the finals or trying to ignore it completely? What are you and your teammates doing together (if anything) instead of following along? (if you're on Hamilton or New Orleans, or either of the 2 SMJHL teams that soon will be playing in the finals - congrats and sorry :p this one isn't for you!)

The Season 54 playoffs was overwhelmingly tragic for the Buffalo Stampede as they clawed back from a 3-1 series deficit in the Conference Finals but ultimately fell in double overtime in Game 7 to the Hamilton Steelhawks. Most notably, the SHL’s most hated player, Gabriel “Gone Wild” Johnson, scored the game winner. With such a devastating loss at the hands of Augustus Wang’s most trauma-inducing person, Wang has stated publicly that he will be going off the grid for the entirety of the off-season. He stated that he is taking a long hiatus to one of his friends’ farms to help them work and gain some of that farmer strength. When asked about what they grow at his friend’s farm, Wang was noticeably silent and chose to deflect the question rather than delve into it further. Wang only commented that he’d be “chillin’ with the cows” and “vibin’ with the sheep”. You can only expect what this may be as he continues to promote his sponsorship with SHL Kush and his promo code WANG20.

(174 Words)

6/16

Quote:3. Written, 2 TPE (100 words min.)
It has been publicized a decent amount on this site but Hamilton prospect Andrei Kostitsyn's brother Sergei appears to be missing. Does anybody know where Sergei? What have you done/what can you do to help Andrei track down his brother?

All of the talk surrounding (Clean) Andrei Kostitsyn’s missing brother Sergei has been relatively inconclusive. However, my sources have told me that the Simulation Hockey League’s Commissioner “S Dis Cock” has the answer. You may wonder why a player of (Clean) Andrei’s caliber would have ended up joining the SMJHL’s Newfoundland Berserkers, only to be drafted by the hackers known as the Hamilton Steelhawks. Well, the answer is quite obvious if you ask me. The SHL’s Commissioner, “S Dis Cock”, is holding him hostage and (Clean) Andrei must rise in the ranks and get enough publicity around him to start a social movement against “S Dis Cock's” fascist campaign and the kidnapping of his innocent brother Sergei. With the help from known the known black hat hackers from the Steelhawks, (Clean) Andrei looks to dig deeper into the wormhole that “S Dis Cock” has created. I have heard rumors that “S Dis Cock” has Sergei Kostitsyn binded to a chair and is being broadcasted to a so-called “Red Room” on the Dark Web. We can only hope that the Hamilton Steelhawks will be able to use their hacking abilities for good, rather than continuing to destroy the Simulation Hockey League year after year.

(203 Words)

8/16

Quote:4. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
S54 IIHF Predictions - with one FHM IIHF season under our belt, we've got a bit more of a sense of how the tournament might play out in the new sim engine. What are your predictions for the S54 IIHF or WJC tournament - how do you think your team will fare this season? Who do you think are the biggest contenders to take home the hardware and why?

With the removal of Gabriel “Gone Wild” Johnson, a global tyrant, the members of Team Canada are finally starting to learn how to be themselves again. Formerly, Gone Wild Johnson ran the team akin to a contemporary concentration camp and forced propaganda down the throats of both the players and the media to further his grasp on Canada’s best hockey players. Hopefully Gone Wild’s replacements, Nokazoa and Briedaqueduc, can finally bring together a squad that has always had high expectations but could seemingly never put that talent together for a deep run in the IIHF tournament. The new General Mangers have gone on the record to say that people should have little expectations going into the incoming Season 54 IIHF Tournament as Team Canada looks to fix the tainted minds of their superstar hockey players. Instead, they should shift their hate to Team Canada’s most recent defector in Jack Kanoff and scrutinize his decision to leave such a storied nation. As long as Kanoff’s new nation, Team Germany, does poorly then Canadians should be proud of wherever they end up as thing cannot get any worse.

(186 Words)

11/16

Quote:6. Written, 3 TPE (150 words min.)
Occasionally, broadcast networks will bring an active player into the TV coverage of ongoing finals if their team has been eliminated, and that player is often to give unique insights from a current player's perspective. During this NOLA-HAM finals, which SHL player or prospect would be a good addition to the Challenge Cup TV coverage? Why would that player be a good addition to the broadcast team?

The only correct answer to this question is the SMJHL’s most storied player, Newfoundland Berserker, (Clean) Andrei Kostitsyn. (Clean) Andrei would be able to use the media attention from being on national media to broadcast the movement to find his brother Sergei Kostitsyn. Besides, nobody cares about a team from New Orleans and nobody cares about perennial cheaters in the Hamilton Steelhawks. In fact, all of the Challenge Cup coverage should be changed to an international 24/7 broadcast on finding (Clean) Andrei’s brother Sergei. If I was to be honest with you, the SHL’s decision to not do this is damning evidence towards the established narrative that the league knows where his brother is and their refusal to comment on the potential whereabouts of Sergei Kostitsyn. The members of the SHL should be ashamed of “S Dis Cock's” silencing of (Clean) Andrei and the search for former NHL superstar, Sergei Kostitsyn. The world needs to know about the SHL’s kidnapping of one of the world’s best hockey players and the silencing of one of the biggest up-and-coming prospects in the SMJHL.

(181 Words)

14/16

Quote:10. Graphic, 3 TPE
Create a magazine cover that highlights either a player in the finals or a standout player from the regular season.

17/16

Quote:16. CW TRIVIA, 3 TPE max - 1 TPE for participation, 0.5 TPE for each correct answer. This is now completed through a Google form linked below. Make sure to spell your answers correctly or you will not get credit. Post your verification word in your CW post.

hamiltoncheatedagainsmh